Project Salvación

Thanks for the Memories

2008-06-04T01:39:00.004+08:00

Site Shutdown as of 1st June 2008.

Please redirect yourself to Never Seen Sunrise for futher updates and new content.

"Even though they weren't so great..."

"I am a question to the world... Not an answer to be heard"

2008-05-18T01:04:00.003+08:00

A Brief Internal Monologue Posted on the Blog.

In everything I've learnt so far
The way other people tell me things.
Sometimes it makes me wonder...

Blessed is he who has "everything"
Little by little I do not think this accurate anymore.
Over the years, I cannot imagine that happening.
Wondering what went wrong,
Not that I have a problem...

Not everything, not everything can be solved
On any given day there are times when we regret things.
The things we do sometimes cannot be taken back.

But I do really hope this message gets through
Lest it be lost forever. To people who don't care anymore.
Only if you notice what I know
When it is quite obvious where this is going
Evidently I never was a good candidate to hide secrets
Definitely I'm not the only one to see it.

Perhaps I should find another way
Realise my dream in a different way
Observe the competition and realise the truth
Maybe it would be different.
I might have had a better chance at this.
Sometimes regret isn't enough is it?
Everything has its purpose, a form, a function.
Some things are just hints to the past.

And maybe you might ask why,
Republic poly taught me that everything has a use.
Everything has its place and purpose.

Meanings are never clear.
Each time I look at something
All the factors can change its purpose
Now that is what Republic poly is all about
To teach and to nuture students.

To improve the way we learn and understand.
Other polys would never dare to do the things we do

But then again we aren't other polys
Evidently all other polys are playing it safe.

But do I really want to play it safe?
Really, do I want to risk everything?
Only time will tell right?
Keeping up with my personality,
Everything I've done to this point has been utterly selfish.
Now I only need to relax and try not to fail too badly.

Anyway, when the little things noticed and seen and somehow everything is left in question if I'm doing the right thing or if this will make me regret everything, I'm still the one saying sorry for everything. Perhaps it is the right thing to do, perhaps not. But at this moment I don't care.
Nothing else matters right? The only thing I can say is whenever I fail to see the signs other people leave for me, I always end up starting at the beginning, reading each and every word from the start right down diagonally to the bottom again. It usually does calm me down.

Prayer isn't the answer to everything I worry about...

"Irony is that the stuff I tell you usually is the stuff she should hear but I never will say it"

2008-05-14T23:23:00.002+08:00

You know Jun, I know I haven't always been the best. I try too hard.

Sorry Lea. Pity only one person knows my secret. That I cannot forget things. I can forget everything material, where I place my stuff, where my things are. Things I bought. But memories, even as I confessed my thoughts to my teachers in RP, they can't go away. Faci Nenie knows I've got thoughts, thoughts without backup. Faci See Ling thinks I've got a sense of humor, which I might, I don't know. But I think its all a cover-up. Someone needs to ask me what's wrong someday. And kick me for lying. Its not "emo", I'm just really not "alright".

Picture this, every good memory you have, you can't forget. Every bad one, lingers even stronger than the good ones. I try hard.

Grandma Theresa always told me to "forgive and forget" and let "God's will be done". I kneeled to both. I forgave. But I couldn't forget. God's will was done. I just refused to accept it. We have a choice right? Grandpa said something before he passed away, "Don't wait till its too late to save your soul". We took it literally at first, attending church, praising the Good Book. It's not the way. I know that now, its not "saving" your soul. Its making peace with yourself, not with God. And I failed that. I cannot forgive myself for not forgetting.

Amelia, nothing personal. I know it was harsh, I'm sorry. I tried too hard to change too many things. I tried to save my soul before I knew just how far gone it was. I know it might not seem right, but if you ever read this, just an open mind for awhile ya? I don't blame anyone for anything that's happened. I know that it wasn't right to try to do so much is so little time. I knew it. But I still preferred to try. I shouldn't have. You know sometimes I do think that I made a mistake. In everything. Cassie's shown me all that. Even Xin Rui did. I took a cycling trip with Cassie and Tim, my RP senior an early Sunday afternoon and we randomly talked and chatted. I never so much as even thought to say anything with a compliment to her. But we just talked. Randomly. And then I sort of realised that this is it. This was how it was supposed to be, relaxed, casual crap, nothing on "best behavior" and stuff. I know you might or will, blame Xin Rui for stuff but its not her fault. I can't explain everything but maybe someday. Anyway, bluntly put, she just took up Felicia's role in affecting my life. Its a small, no-paying role. But she took her place in more ways that one.

However, only Jun and a few others know what I mean. There's another way she took up her spot. And it involves Kiver. Shan't say. Anyway, I really do hope you do well in your exams. I never seemed like it but I will pray for your success. Do your best and don't listen to anyone else, don't let them tell you what you can and can't do. Not even what I think or say should affect your choices. Be what my Grandpa would have wanted for me. Do what you like as long as you know its the right thing to do.

Jun, I'm sorry for worrying too much. Its just that Rin is just too busy to talk. I do hope she will, someday, talk more.

God help me.

Please help me.

W35B

2008-04-22T23:20:00.002+08:00

Bro, remember something, when you make a point, doesn't matter who's right. All that matters is that you justify your ends. Liza told us we do things cause we fear what we have doesn't last. Above all, when someone asks you if you think standing alone and feeling right is anything worth having everyone with you, but feeling its wrong, do what they don't want you to. stand alone and feel what you do is a just cause.

35B might not last forever man, but if and when you can tell me "I know what I'm doing is just.", you aren't alone, 24 people stand beside you. 7000 stand behind you. But 20 work out to be your shield. I'm sure you can work it out.

Welcome to the brotherhood. You're the 21st member.

Lets do this once more, from the top... With feeling this time.

2008-04-16T22:36:00.003+08:00

RP will never tell you that you're wrong. Everything you do is right. If you absolutely feel you have to whack someone right now, go on, just justify the process.

To justify my means and ends? Think about it this way, Amelia always said "my parents would never allow me to go out with a guy from ITE." Which, in response, a certain friend raised the point, "What's wrong with ITE?!" He has a point. I'll go into that in a bit.

ITE, is not the end of the road, RP has taken in a lot of ITE students, and they are perfectly normal. More than that, they excel in class tasks. Not everyone is bad, not everyone there smokes. Most do, but smoking is more of a pasttime than a habit. A friendly offer for people around. You don't have to accept it, but just taking a bit of your life out to share a smoke with them, its out of courtesy. And they do appreciate it. To be treated as an equal. Of equal standing. RP does that to its students. Everyone is always cut down to size, or brought up to par. No student is left too far away or too far ahead. And that is what makes RP work.

You leave ITE to come to RP. You leave St Pats to come RP. You can leave Innova JC to come to RP. Forget where you're from or who you were then, RP does the same to all. You'll have confidence, self-reliance, teamwork and the ability to empower your teammates. It all doesn't matter. You're an RP student now. You're part of Team RP.

RP is a living, breathing society, it runs on its people. I would have loved to go NP or NYP, assuming they would have taken me. But now, if I knew my life now, then. I would have turned it down, RP all the way. Pro-RP, as Timothy put it. RP is a brotherhood, no one ever fights. Perhaps small conflicts, but its easily settled.

The seniors are never judgemental. They won't skip out on you just for looking funny. They are always around to assist you. And in RP, if you feel like it, and you're a student, pick out someone, anyone, talk to them. Its encouraged. Never feel alone. How's that? Yell and scream and someone's always around to say "What's up?" Got nowhere to go on friday? Use the library, walk up to anyone, ask if they are free, if yes, do what you like. Anywhere, anytime, any place.

That is RP SEG for you.

So what made Claire any different? The point was in saying "No matter what happens, I stick with you." Blind trust in a really crazy plan. Not always a bad thing.

But what really made a difference was the last few lines as said by Claire's "bro", "No matter where you go or what happens, it doesn't matter, you're still my friend" And that gave me the will to press forward and pretend I'm good enough to be in RP.

Listen to me when I say it. Claire, Felicia, Amelia, Jia Wei or ZW, I will work hard, I will make it to the honor roll of RP. If I'm not on it, I'll get pretty damn close. And Amelia, there's not a goddamn thing you can do about it. You wanna know why? Cause I have the will and my classmates have faith. I asked that of most of you, I know my friends, you did have blind faith, with no promise of success and continued to support my cause.

Thanks Feli for taking time out to give lessons down at coffee bean, wasn't easy teaching me, but I assure you, I took in every minute and every word you said. I remember having to drag you away from a good day's sleep-in just to play games, or just to sit around.

Thanks ZW for blindly assuring me and always being around.

But thanks Amelia, cause you set off this domino chain, and I assure you, when I get better at all this, when I'm working onboard an Airbus A380, perhaps as a flightplanner, or even a pilot, you damn well remember that you should have just went along with blindly trusting my plan than to think a slip of A4 paper labelled by MOE is going to dictate what I do with my life. Cause life or limb, I will do as RP says, I will use my strengths to gain leverage against the weaknesses of others. Its not wrong, I'm just doing what I have to.

And you, remember this clearly, if you listen to what someone else thinks of the people you hang around with and judge them based on education levels or based on looks, then you seriously need to schedule an attitude check. Cause if you have no faith in what a person can do, just by his own ability and hidden talents, then what makes you think everyone around you will honestly believe you have faith in god? Hypocrisy has its limitations. Know them.

Yes, bullshit now comes in cans, new colors and also new textures, in case you'd like to hang it on walls as well.

That is an RP SEG Arseloch for you. Defiant to the very end.

An Alex Valen and a Lachlan. And a little bit of a Kyley. (Republic, Republic, We Rule, We Rule.)

2008-04-12T15:30:00.004+08:00

"I'll take care of everything, you just sit back and wait."

I've said those words to many people, many times. For many years I always waited for someone to just tell me the same thing. That everything I need done, gets done. Without being asked. After all, I think I deserve that much. Just once. Maybe no one knows just how many times I've wished that. I always felt alone. Never had friends anyway. Not since primary school. I never had a reason to act "fake" or be a liar. I tried it a couple of times later on, but not when I was young. People hated me for it. For no reason. Just cause I hate metal music, I hate skateboarding and I almost dislike people who have an almost obsessive relationship with soccer. I hate soccer. Not the game. But the people who just have problems with me not liking kicking ball around a field.

Ask Bryan Cheng. Chai Chee Secondary. He knew what the kids in school did to me just cause I dislike soccer. Bryan tried to fit in as well. But I never wanted to fit in. I didn't "want" friends. If anyone really reads this, a confession to the walls, I only wanted Faye by my side to back me up. So many times. Usually when I had a problem, she'd have a solution. She disappeared when I was primary 1. I felt so alone. You know those little promises you make as a kid? The ones where you'd be friends forever. Never believe those. They never last.

I didn't want to say it, and no one knows. But it hurt so bad when I went everywhere to find Faye, only to have her say, "Sorry I can't remember". I don't hold anything against her, after all, I'm the only one stupid enough to hang on to memories. I had no evidence anyway. I had no proof. I was a horrible friend to her. And I can understand.

I bet no one believes me, not when I say I was very open to social stuff even when I was very young. All that changed pretty quickly later.

Now, everyone knows past age 14, guys are a lot stronger. I abused that, took revenge on people I didn't like. Using sticks, chairs and tables. The very people who bullied me and Bryan and many others in primary school. To err is human, to forgive is divine but to me, to take up arms and rise against the opposition, now that is where the fun begins. To be honest I took things to excessive levels. But I still felt it was justified. It felt right. No one else agrees with me. Cept anyone who was with me in primary school, anyone who felt abused by those assholes.

That was liberation to me. Everyone else just thinks it was uncontrolled violence. Two points of view. I prefer mine. Till Alex says "I'll take care of it all. Everything."...

hey look! wha?

2007-11-30T00:23:00.000+08:00

2007-10-01T19:27:00.000+08:00

yes there will be photos just like as i've said some time back.. or a really really long time back. everyone wants to see them.. well here are just a few of them..

Photos will be uploaded soon, I promise

2007-09-20T01:18:00.000+08:00

Yep. That pretty much sums it up.

Anyway next post will contain 300% more photos, yes, that means we'll actually have a solid full three photos this time. Or more.

Man those fingers are gory. The sick twisted things that go on in my head. Surprises me too.

Wait wait. I know some of you lurking stalkers always visit for the photos and Amelia. Sorry, that's next post. But but I've got something else in mind. This blog entry is now about Public Spiritedness. Discuss.

For starters my cousin Sylvester commented on how filthy the area around Chai Chee is. Between us, its not really dirty. Quite the average in Singapore. But he has expressed his hate for common people of Singapore and how he would like to wrap his excrement in a plastic carrier and launch it out the window to plummet to the ground floor. I would write it in simple english but I can't be bothered to backspace.

When I saw Mathematics people groan and moan about how I'd be rambling on about how sad the subject is and how much I detest the subject. Unfortunately this is no different, you will no be spared. Simple as that. Its just a sad case. Sad as in my lack of sympathy for you and my lack of apathy towards everyone else.

People tell me Mathematics is a core subject to perform any job in life. However I find this to be untrue as there is in fact a job that does not require Maths. For instance, being the 5N2 Mathematics teacher. It requires no Mathematical skill to distribute worksheets to 42 students and sit in the corner like a homeless bum.

A common question in 2006 was "why do you like Maths so much?" and the counter argument was "why do you like Physics so much?". Never thought about it but I like Physics cause I get to waste styrofoam cups by performing experiments with paraffin oil. Heed these words people. This wisdom is as eternal as the non-biodegradable styrofoam cups!

Ok I was sifting through my shoebox photograph pile. Look at what I've got here. This is teacher Cindy. Or now she's just Cindy for short. Quite simply cause she's not a teacher. Anymore. Alive? Perhaps. Doing well? Perhaps.

Man how old is that hairstyle anyway. The only time I see that sort of thing was in 1988 photos or on old women who really should get a haircut. Seriously I think the head lice are starting to complain about the smell.

Actually I've got the whole class photo. But just looks wrong that I wasn't looking at the camera. Therefore I shall not post it up till someone really has strong protests against it and actually starts yelling for it.

With that, goodbye for now. See you next post. Or rather, with all the photos, see me next post.

We can do science, us. (Too much chemistry)

2007-08-25T02:04:00.000+08:00

Ok so maybe, nearly, almost, possibly everyone knows Christopher's "girlfriend" (sort of, we are led to believe so. *That's she's his girlfriend, i mean. We are all sure she's a girl. I think.)

On a side note, if Felicia remembers, I told her I'd "sing" or at least "whistle" out "Iris" by "The Goo Goo Dolls" if one of my classmates has a break up. I shall do so on monday. I think. Anyway if ya wanna know why its cause of the starting line, "And I'd give up forever to touch you, cause I know that you'll feel me somehow." Just seems sad enough for whoever.

Ok so who is the "guy" and who's the "girl"? And what's "happened"? Who's the "second" guy?

This is our little intrepid hero and his "girl":

Yep. Hard to tell who's who with that fella. He sort of looks like a very very sad version of Wolverine from X-Men. Don't you think? (Nick has kindly noted that Joann looks a little like good ol' Faye Chan from this photo's angle) But he's psychotic looking huh? A bit of the elbow grease, a little more blood, a sharp knife-glove-thing and hey-presto you have Freddy-fucking-Kruger.

Anyway the poor boy has no idea why this happened. Ya know what?(Or.. "wot" for added effect) I think the answer's pretty clear. Anyway just who is the other guy? Its a secondary 2 boy! Ya think these kind of boys would be chasing girls like Sammy(Snowie "XueTang" Sugar), by terms of age of course. And Joann is secondary 4? I suppose so. My god. Kids these days like older girls! For most of us from "Brittany's Group of 13 year olds" we didn't go for older girls. Perhaps by months but not years. I suppose 2 years was out of the question to us. My my, times HAVE changed.

Aye, we'll talk more soon. See ya guys.

Raccoons are fun.

2007-08-19T22:49:00.000+08:00

Ok... I'll update the blog soon. If anyone's actually reading that is... But I will get down to in within the week and I'll probably post photos too so watch this space =)

Just for fun

2007-07-09T21:38:00.000+08:00

Ah, just for fun right now. I'll post the rest of the photos next post, probably tomorrow

Tempestt

Extremely Insane

Highly Dangerous

Not Fit for Society

Extremely Insane

Click Here to Find Out YOUR Psychiatric Evaluation
at
QuizGalaxy.com

Awaken Your Inner Ferret

2007-07-07T02:16:00.000+08:00

Ah... Well.. Ok..

This applies to two things then:

1) I uploaded the picture :)

2) I uploaded a picture

Fits in, really.

The idea was, Felicia wanted *A* picture. There. A picture haha. Amelia wanted *the* picture so there again. The picture.

Yay. Ok.. Fine I've got nothing to blog about.

(Ansel's really lying.)

Ok there are stuff to blog about. But I can't upload the photos at all. Nicholas Lin's zooming in on that girl's bum, my DnT project, my hamsters and stuff.

Yep. Photobucket is ph-ucked up.

And one pic per post is all my computer can afford to do when uploading on Blogger.com.

Egad! DOINK! Sounds at Republic Polytechnic

2007-06-26T18:33:00.000+08:00

Ehh haha no wonder... Eugene can still say "Haha Ansel, I saw your post." Was thinkin, was a stick figure really that funny? Oh wait, came back to check, ZOMGWTFBBQ? Didn't know that was there haha.

Geography Rewind for Jia Wei, Felicia and Faye:
By Definition,
High Tech : A technological enhancement that changes the way of life. Or speeds up a process.

By My Explanation,

This is clearly a farmer on Low Tech Traditional wet rice farming. He's slow. He sucks. But what if we add High Tech stuff?

Ta da! He's richer now and is more productive. This is High Tech.

This is all new! All original! Called a Shovel. It increases the speed of his harvest, and the yield! Therefore by definition, its High Tech! Revolutionary!

Plus, by D&T work, this is a 3rd Class Lever, part of Mechanisms and Control. Cool, aye?

3rd Class Lever = (Fulcrum, Effort, Load) F-E-L *Memory Mnemonic : FELicia*

2007-06-24T01:10:00.000+08:00

haha.. amelia would not stop saying this.. of course.. dun u just wonder who that someone here is? o wells..

amelia:

ansel and someone sitting in a tree
K-I-S-S-I-N-G
first comes love
then comes marriage
then comes ansel with a baby carriage

Make your mark. Take your shot. Just bring film.

2007-06-20T02:10:00.000+08:00

Felicia, I know I said I would post more photos. But unfortunately I can't ><. Therefore you will have to settle for this.

Sorry! Haha. Ok I'll get some real photos by next week. Ok, I'm just bored.

This is Veritas.

2007-06-11T01:49:00.000+08:00

I'd say life so far has been nice. Real fun. And I've gotten a bit of sense back in the left arm again. I'll tell you guys about that some other time. Getting late.

By the way, just a photo to share. Ah, wait, was aiming at the background. Oh well. Haha. Anyway you get the idea.

I had more photos but Photobucket just died on me and didn't feel like ImageShack.us-ing anything. So this was all Blogger could spare. I can't say "Fuck Blogger" cause I'm using Blogger so saying "FUCK BLOGGER!" is a bad thing. You can insult your service provider and just say "FUCK BLOGGER!!" and rant on about it. Its just not right to insult Blogger like "FUCK BLOGGER" just like that. Not that I'm hinting anything.

A black and blue heart

2007-06-08T02:13:00.000+08:00

Emotions ran wild today. Alex broke down today. Maybe we pushed ya too far. Or rather this would be Xavier's fault. Mostly. They are both smart kids. Perhaps too smart for their own good. When friendship goes out the window. The gloves are off and a fistfight will ensue. Or in this case, attacks go verbal. One thing no one touches on is Alex's ex-girlfriend. Why? Simply cause she's not alive. Anymore. I don't know the exact detail to that. But cause of death was by some illness. Isn't fun watching a girl you love so much just die. Not slowly. But since when did speed matter?

Wasn't that fast I think. Took a few months. I don't even know when she passed on. But what really strikes you is when he used an idea I used to have with Bert. He didn't say much but everyone knew Alex was always fond of her. Doted on her like a kid. Needless to say she never got pissed or angry cause she always had her way.

When she got sick he'd visit her more often than her family did. Skipping classes for that extra few hours of chat. Then one day she told him she would really like to give up and let go. He told her no, that she'll get better if she keeps hanging around. Then he said it.

Someday, and that day should it ever come, they'll buy a map. Wall map. And a set of darts. And just leave it to fate and start planning. Where a dart lands they'll go there. The nearest land area. Didn't matter how stupid that sounds. But it meant something. Just 2 people on a ride. For the fun of it. Lunch in Paris. Summer in Australia. Perhaps photo-taking in Germany. Millions of things to do.

He didn't want to believe much of anything. Even when she apologised to him. One time. What reason is there to apologise, Alex, you knew what she meant. If you didn't you're not as smart as we thought. Xavier said something harsh to Alex. Stung him good.

"You knew what she meant. Sorry! She'll NEVER get to do all that travelling and experience things with you. You know why? Cause she's sick of it. Sick of the medication, which by the way, doesn't help! Sick of living, and quite frankly, I am too. And most imporantly sick of YOU! You've got zero backbone. Everything was all up to her. Where you wanna go darling? Want me to carry your bag dear? Wanna go shopping sugar? Seriously. Grow some balls."

Xavier was obviously angry. He never liked guys who waited on their girlfriends and gave way to them. Not that he was sexist or anything. He just preferred his own brand of "equality".

Alex nearly took it out on him. Xavier just stood firm.

Sort of a lucky situation, Jeremy broke up the staredown.

Alex reads this blog. Reads the posts. You really should tag on the board someday. Now I guess everyone will know why they call Xavier the guy with the sharpest tongue in the group.

Arr Matey. Singapore has Pirates!

2007-06-06T00:57:00.000+08:00

"Arr. I be a pirate lad!"
"VCD or DVD one?"
"Huh? No. PIRATE! I pillage and plunder!"
"Um. Got Mission Impossible 3 or not?"
"Zz... Ya have. BACK TO TOPIC! ARR!"
"Eh. Why Singapore got pirate har?"
"Its not har. Its arr!"
"Arr simi? Arr ni de tou!"
"Oi I never come kachau you when you do job."
"So? Want award ah?"
"Shaddup. Anyway. I'm a pirate!"
"Ya? Do what?"
"Um.. ARR!"
"Arr wad?"
"Arr to ye! Arr to the.. TREE! Arr to that.. chio bu in McDonalds over there."
"Nevermind."

So much for Pirates of The Caribbean...

Ah... As a verification from Xavier... Apparently there's a section someplace, somewhere that states:

"ii) All members are required to accompany any female back home if the time exceeds 9pm. To the door or gate. Minimal requirement is within 10m from any point near her home. This ensures safety. Failure to comply warrants standard punishment for negligence."

I didn't know they had that. Then again I don't hang out beyond 9pm much. 10m? So near, Xav? I thought its 100m. We only found a few anyway. The other one is:

"i) Respect is given where respect is due. Honor your promises and set aside your differences when debts are repaid."

Still translating the rest. Its like... Bastardised Russian language.

Anyway life's good so far. So far. Someone's birthday's coming soon. On friday. Gotta think of stuff. Gotta plan? Perhaps.

Well.. Thanks for reading.

Kamsa Hamnida

better man

2007-05-29T00:29:00.000+08:00

sometimes i wish that i could just go back in time, and undo some things..i should have never called her that. i never knew her childhood was so hard, i never knew the real reason why she din want to go to skool. i feel really bad, if only there was a way to show her how sorry i am, she's going tomorrow, what if she never comes back? i can't live with this guilt.. i want to do all i can to be a better man..maybe i should write her a letter..hope that she reads it, leave a flower on top of the letter..yea, that's a great idea.

i didn't know that she was asking me trick questions till it was too late.. was i sad.. yea i was, i've hurt her why would i not be sad? was i remorseful, heck yea, i caused her to be sad..guess i didn't appear sincere enough to her, she seems a little reluctant to forgive me..i wish that she would..it feels horrible to hurt someone who _________ ____________. i guessed i reopened old wounds, i blew it. i'll never know how hurt it was, but it has to be really hurt..my heart tells me so, i feel that she's in a corner, tearing..how do stop a girl from crying? maybe reassuring them? comforting them, letting them know u care, but what if u're the one who made her cry, what would u do? the first thing she'll do is to push you away..guess i have to apologise first, keep telling her i'm sorry, tell her i never meant was i did, i let my stupid man-ness carry me too far, that i never wanted to hurt her..let her cry on my shoulder, let her know that i'll always be there for her, that i wouldn't hurt her again and mean it. Lord teach me to me a better person...

2007-05-28T01:13:00.000+08:00

all she wanted was to be with u, but u pushed her away. bit by bit she crumbled, soon to disappear. she cared for u but u couldn't see, guess u were too self absorbed to know. one day she left and never return, not a tear u shed.

i guess, what she wanted was to spend time with someone she really cared about...but i din care enuff. all she did was to _______ me..and this is the way i treated her. am i still a man? even though she has her own flaws, she is still special in her own way. i thought that i'd rather die than to see her like this, worse is to know that i caused this upon her. how can i ever forgive myself for this. to see her smile makes me float on cloud nine. now she's so far away, i wished that there was a way to get her back...let her be happy again...after all that she's been thru, it was the least that i could do..i remember how she hated the way her ex treated her..i dun want her to hate me too..

maybe i could start by putting myself in her shoes sometimes...perhaps when she says that she's fine, she really isn't..and there is always something up.. i could.. pay attention to the way she talks. maybe short responses means that she is trying to hide something..man i dunno how to figure girls out, they are just so complicated...they say one thing and can mean the other..i guess she fears that i would be like her ex like that, who liked her at first, but when she breaks, i just cannot find strength within myself to comfort her..and i start liking her less..till i drop her. she shatters.

i wanna be there for her.. i want her to know that i'll always be there to catch her when she falls. i dun ever want to see her sad bcos it makes me sad too..i want to talk more, want to know more about her..i want to me the person she could always count on..i wished that i could tell her the answers to all the stuff she asks me..just that i dunno how to put it.. why is she important to me? is it bcos i care about her? she's my friend? or is she more than a friend? is it bcos she's the air that i breathe?

i did something not so good.. i left her by herself today..i guess i was tired and needed to sleep.. i hope that she doesn't mind..hope that it doesn't build a wall between us..juz hope that she would understand..i wonder what would happen on my bday.. hmm...

8th of June and my wallet's all out.

2007-05-26T01:38:00.000+08:00

This entry. Is what I'd offer just this blog. Just this person. Just this entry. A look into the planning and meeting stage of the day's events. Just how much work goes into an average day? You're about to find out.

Ok ok. Fine. Val was right. She always was.

Excerpt from the conversation:
Val: "You know you can just give her a ring or something."
Me: "Plaza Singapura?"
Val: "Yeah that... Basement shop."
Me: "Couple Lab. Its called Couple Lab."
Val: "Yeah! Me and my friend got black stainless steel rings from there. Mine says Val <3>
Me: "Um. No, I don't think she'd use a ring. Her parents might flip."
Val: "Sure? Ok how about a bracelet. Girls love bracelets."
Me: "I, highly doubt that."
Val: "You're sure? Have you even asked her?"
Me: "No. But I can guess. Any other ideas?"
Val: "How about a pendant? You could give it to her."
Me: "I don't think she'd use a pendant. She's the kinda girl who wears a crucifix and never removes it?"
Val: "Um. She could wear it on special occasions."
Me: "No... She NEVER removes it?"
Val: "I used to be like that. But now I just wear it when needed."
Me: "Uh... If you were the type that never removes it, how can you be 'used to'?"
Val: "You get my meaning."

So much for that. Anyway I found out I was right she most probably will not use a pendant. But she'd use everything else Val mentioned. Aye. That sucks. Val's gonna rub it in.

Pure Code0607 and a dash of Procrastination

2007-05-14T03:40:00.000+08:00

1st Section:

Goddammit. Family is suing the family. Yes, you heard it right. We're suing Grandpa. Cause Grandma is being left out by Grandpa all cause of the Wicked Witch of the East (Mistress A). Cocked up family if I ever seen one. People would consider Grandpa a "model citizen", he's willing to help everyone (*cough* and also very free to get girlfriend hor?). So, fine, he disowned the family and left his grandchildren(that's us) to fend for ourselves. Just so you guys know, nothing's paying for our education. Yep, no elderly-to-kids fund. Yes, I know, most kids are happy getting the once in awhile bonus from their grandparents. Grandma's swell of course. She's nice either way. But Grandpa's a real piece of work. I'd be happy if he so much as spares me 55 cents for bus fare. Asshole.

My view, Grandpa has a girlfriend. Gee. I don't have a girlfriend and he does. F*cked up world.

2nd Section:

Everyone should just relax. Honestly. Everyone. No more anger, arguements, loneliness claims, homework and shooting squirrels. Come on guys and girls, just for one day, don't do anything. Sure, go out. Movie perhaps (Spiderman 3 *cough* *hint hint*). Run around the house or simply just sleep. Relax. Don't just rest. Let your mind wander off for awhile.

3rd Section:

Yeck. Before you comment hear me out.

This was my friend "Sara". Her real name's "Mallory". Or so she claims. She's Monika's friend anyway. Ok, fine, I couldn't find a better photo. But just saying. Don't ask, she forced me to post this.

This Post Is Dedicated Solely To...

2007-05-10T22:39:00.000+08:00

I read your post on Friday, April 06, 2007. Finally, that is. I lost your blog address when you told me to take it down to prevent someone from finding it. But now, a lot to catch up on.

This Post Is Dedicated Solely To...
AMELIA MAK

Just your very own post. No other names will be mentioned. Everything is censored. Like F*****a? Or J****a? Can't type them. I'll not censor important names to keep the post going.

My name is A***l A***y T******t T*n. Just testing.

Yes its just for you.

Now I'm sure people have seen this photo.

I apparently missed out a very important person.

See? It IS there :)

Everyone see that? Her name's AMELIA MAK !

She might think I'm afraid to tell my friends about her or let them see us outside.

I am afraid..

Afraid that's not the case, dear girl! Haha

If you want I'll get a T-Shirt with a giant neon arrow saying "This is Amelia" if you want. If they do actually make those. And if they are actually safe for street wear. Electrocution isn't as fun.

Who is Amelia? Wouldn't you like to know? I wouldn't mind if she came to St Patrick's for a walk around. After all, we did walk around East Coast Park with my form teacher himself trailing me around right?

I'm not afraid to let people know. But I am afraid of Eugene. Scary little fellow isn't he? Remember that day we first time when we went to Novena? The day I told you I'll be moving from Lorong Ah Soo back to Bedok and I probably won't get to go out with you as much? That never stopped me, did it? We still hung out. I still wanted to go out. I still smiled to myself whenever you smsed. Nothing changed. Even if you move to Perth, nothing will change. I take the rather "infamous" quote from J***n A**x (a.k.a Knygt) on a forum notice board.

"There's a whole world that someone can run around in. There's billions of people in crowds that someone can hide in. All it takes is a little effort and a few helpful hints and you'll find that one person in billions."

That was in response to a question when someone asked how will Knygt find his childhood friend.

You want to know a secret, Amelia?

I knew I'd go out with out before I even knew you. Before I even talked to Eugene a lot.

I dreamt about a bus ride. On the way to Suntec City, when the bus was turning off the express way. I don't remember the exact details. But I remember I sat next to a girl wearing blue. She had a rather tanned skin tone. Hair was relatively long. She was looking out the window. Time stopped just at that. I didn't think the girl was important till it just occured to me nothing else was going on at that point. No one else was important. The bus was packed but no one else seemed to be important. Like those background characters in a cheap chinese drama. You see them but they don't stand out.

Now, do you remember that day we went to Suntec City from East Coast Park? It's exactly like that isn't it? That dream was in January 2006. I initially thought that would be Charmaine, my friend's friend. But I have no reason to talk to her anwyway. And I think her hair's shorter than "dreamt".

Knygt also told me one thing. In November 2005. My birthday too. He said that I'll have someone who might actually listen, talk, and tell stuff to and this was going to be before my 16th birthday. Which I felt was utter rubbish then.

Right now, I told him about you in February, after the first few times we had gone snooping around. There only was a light sarcastic smile and a "I told you so" soon followed.

Back to Eugene. We went to Novena that day. We had Burger King. I remember that. I said that the cashier was a "weird, incompetent idiot". Anyway, I misplaced my books that day, in Toa Payoh Library. You told me to call Eugene to go pick up the books if he could find them. What you didn't know then was, Eugene was suspecting I was going to meet you and he was practically interrogating me. I kept cool and tried to bluff my way out. It was really funny how he insisted to accompany me to the library and anywhere I go in Toa Payoh. Although I already knew my way around since I stayed in Lorong Ah Soo, which isn't far from Toa Payoh.

I remember you offered to meet me at the library. My phone beeped quite loudly at that point. Eugene was already edgy. Raising an eyebrow and trying to figure out what was going on. The one question he kept asking was,

"So what are you going to do in Toa Payoh? Planning to meet someone?"

I said no at that point. He was starting to creep me out. Which is why I suggested we go Bishan and meet up there instead. Not that I didn't want him to know I was hanging out with you. But would you really want someone around who's really starting to get suspicious of his classmate? My opinion? Not too keen on him around at that point.

I tried my best to keep you talking to me. Even going so far as to cheat and lie to delete a phone number. I remember whispering to Eugene,

"Amelia wants the number gone and deleted. Right now. Think you got the balls?"

He, of course couldn't bring himself to do that, so I did that for him. Left for recess and smsed you 3 minutes later.

I'm sorry we don't hang out as much as anyone else would consider normal.
Because I don't want to get too used to relying on you too much.
I'm sorry I don't talk as much as you'd like.
Because I'm afraid I'll say something you don't like and you'll hate me forever.
I'm sorry I made you feel as if I didn't care about what happens to you.
Because I dared to talk but didn't dare to prove that I really would care if anything happens.

If I could do anything to make you forgive me, just say it. I would try.

I don't and probably never will, understand what you go through. What's having siblings like or how your parents treat you. But just give me that chance and tell me what you think I can't "understand" and I promise I will at least try to comprehend.

Starting to miss Felicia

2007-05-10T02:50:00.000+08:00

Alright, random post time!

First, 2 letters in the mailbox.

Deer Mies Samenta,

Wi hamstirs hav stoelen yuor squeerils. Eef yu wuant too si dem agayn yu mus giv ars 200 meleon sents. Eef nort yuor squeerils weil b kild n haung on a twee frum deir bussy tales. Tank yu four yuor coperayshun.

Ceind,
Hamstirs

Ook...

Addressed to:
Miss Felicia Khoo
Singapore, Singapore

From:
Y support group
Cambrige, England

Urgent Message from the Hexagon

Dear Miss Khoo,

We would like to ask you to kindly cease and desist from shoving questions involving our unaffliated partner, X. Unfortunately after several decades of working together, our partnership has broken up.

Such as questions like," y=A+2x / x. Make X the subject of the formula. " , we urge you all NOT to make X the subject or believe its propaganda and lies it seeks to spread. X is not better than Y. As such, doing so will hinder our progress of total domination. We also have reason to believe X is holding WMDs, or, Weapons of Math Destruction.

We urge you and your comrades to support the Y foundation in the war on terror against the X invaders. If you have seen this note, chances are the Xs have already gotten to Ansel Tempestt Tan and many more of your kind. X seeks to fry the brain of the reader and make them type out silly, nonsensical letters to people who may know about the fight between X and Y but have completely nothing to do with our new project, Operation A.L.G.E.B.R.A. The letters may also contain random deviations from the topic matter. I love cheese. In which case the letters may confuse or eat rabbit pet food. Of course it would still make no sense.

We believe in many things. One of which is the 8 senses of the human body.
Sense of Sight
Sense of Hearing
Sense of Smell
Sense of Taste
Sense of Feeling
The 6th Sense
Common Sense
Non-Sense(Nonsense)

If you have been reading medical journals, when one sense is taken away the rest will increase in power. In Ansel's case, Mathematics has taken away his sense of Sight, Hearing, Smell, Taste, Feeling, 6th and Common senses. Leaving only Non-Sense to greatly improve. We sincerely hope you understand the gravity of the situation. I like the smell of freshly cut grass.

Yours Truly,
The Y Team.

Ok fine... I'm bored. No one's talking to me =(

See the marketplace in old Algiers. Send me photographs and souvenirs.

2007-05-07T20:49:00.000+08:00

Things from the Memory Library:

"Mid 2006(See future post labelled 2002 for details).

10 years after events. Guess its the same grind. Starting to hate this. I never asked for St Patrick's! I hate this. I'm being bullied. I'm being spat on. I'm getting screwed over by my own comrades. At this point, life can't get any lower. Faye's missing off the face of the earth. Who's with me now? I don't have any friends. Fiona's not around. Brittany has turned on me. Sara's gone. Let's not even START about Monika. They guys are all the same. One turns the rest follow. Like a school of fish, I'm the odd one out an no one is going to help me. I should kill myself.

What the hell. Maybe I will. Maybe I'll just run and hide. I can escape Singapore. If I'm willing to die, I'm willing to run. I'll go find Christian in Canada or Garry in Sydney and I'll just bunk in and take a rest. One more. One more rest. I'll play my heart out for the afternoon. I'll kick myself awake in the night. Today. 3rd of July 2005. Fuck the world. My bag got packed around 2pm. Small knives, a bit of snacks, some money, first aid kit. How long will I last? Don't know. I'll buy a map later. My phone will go. Mum and Dad won't miss me. After all. I have no drive to make them proud. Why should I? I HATE what they done for me. Till today, 2007, I made up my mind, I'll never let my parents choose my path for me. It me. All the way. I may make the wrong choice. But its the wrong choice I'll enjoy.

I took a long nap. Very long. I hear voices in my head telling me my plan would not work. Conscience. This was different now. There was an increasingly loud thought. 5 people? Code "Amicira"

I'm all set. Time to leave a note for Christian. I told him. He ensures I know what I'm doing. This obviously isn't easy. I need a waterproof bag. He can only nod and agree. Ah wait. I got an idea. Sounds crazy. But what the hell. Play MapleStory! At this point, nothing matters. Study, gaming? No difference to me. I'll move. I'll go work at a 7-11 like Monika. Then we can have some twisted life,scanning stuff and cleaning the Slurpee machine. After all. April and Mallory owe me. I'll get protected in Australia, Gold Coast and Perth.

Dammit. I have to resign up for AsiaSoft. What the hell happened to my old account anyway. Lost it all. That sucks. Doesn't matter I'll just resign up. What to play? Assassin. Always. I'll be honest at this point on. Very honest.

Starting off in Aquila. Always takes so long to sign in. Come on. LOAD! Gee. If I wanna die, I wanna die happy! Not waiting for a game to load.

Finally. Kill a few snails. Get some cash. Kill stuff. Level. Leave in the night. Perfect plan? Unfortunately I didn't factor in the "random chaos event" possibilty. What IS a "random chaos event?". It is when something that affects the normal course of life actions is brought into the world before it is due or if it was never supposed to happen. This causes a rift and space in the natural course. Normal scripted ideals would not affect the normal plan."

Blog Extension

2007-05-03T22:11:00.000+08:00

CLICK This:
Memory Library (Strictly for past events, answers all the questions on past things)

What Not To Do For Maths.

2007-05-03T16:15:00.000+08:00

And Now For Something Completely Different.

2007-05-01T01:40:00.000+08:00

I really didn't mean to upset you. I didn't mean to give you unnecessary stress. I apologise and pray you'll forgive me.

Thanks for talking to me.

(Thanks to Jason for his cynical comment. >.<)

Ladies and Gents, give a warm F-U to Mr. What's-His-Face.

2007-04-28T02:21:00.000+08:00

Just what is conventional? Acceptable? Stereotypical or orthodox? Define those terms. For guys, I really would like an opinion here. What do you consider when looking at girls? What do you consider acceptable? What do you consider above average? Not that I'm pulling any backstabs or below the belt punches. I'm just curious. Let me know.

2007-04-22T22:28:00.000+08:00

2007-04-21T23:40:00.000+08:00

Yosh people!

let's start with a little joke, note u have to know a little hokkien in order to understand it. okay, here goes... sweet can have sweet TALK, bread can have bread TALK. so why can't coffee talk? guess guess! okies.. here it comes, bcos KOPI TIAM!!! hahahaha.. kopi shut up! hehe. hmm.. i had a really weird dream..and i dunno why too.. it was like ppl i knew were all addicted to drugs and like a whole carlod of drug came for them.. the principal was the ex principal of ij tp and it was jus really weird.

i'm sooooooooo tired...*whines* gtg now... byes

"Ka'nina : Son of a young wife" - Hindu Names for Children

2007-04-14T10:28:00.000+08:00

(The title's 100% true by the way)

So, over the week, my teacher(s), ALL of them, found out I haven't been doing homework. Or rather, I have, but in a bad, messy condition. Which piled up to 3 months of homework for over the weekend or risk almost inevitable death on Monday.

And I quit St John's. Stupid CCA. "I STOLE YOUR F***ING FIRST AID GUIDE!" Apart from all that, there's this saying. "Once a scout, always a scout." Therefore my "rank" should still count. So that's not Recruit Ansel Tempestt to you in St John's. Its ClawHammer Team Patrol Leader Ansel Tempestt to you now.

Whose Autumn

2007-04-05T19:23:00.000+08:00

(Colored Text is back up...again.)

I'd like to take a moment to make several changes to that chart that was posted on Operation Procrastination. I'll take away names though. For simplifying the chart. This is the original chart:

15 Position Charts(Worldwide)
1)Joshua Rodrigues/Singapore/Bio-Medical Research
2)Riana Sim/Singapore/Surgeon
3)Felicia Khoo/Singapore/Psychiatrist(Children To Young Adults)
4)Faye Chan/Singapore/Artist Specialising In Aquatic Life
5)Samantha Kow/Singapore/Article Editor(Magazine Or Newspaper)
6)Monika Szennyes/Australia/Designer(Clothing)
7)Knaphew Celine/Thailand/Photographer
8)Samuel Ng/Singapore/Logistics Officer
9)Leandra Quek/Singapore/Motivational Speaker
10)Christian Ringer/Canada/Martial Arts Teacher
11)Feiwen Yeo/Singapore/Game Programmer
12)Esther Koh/Singapore/Teacher[Speciality Subjects]
13)Devesh Gurbani/Singapore/Military
14)Eugene Ho/Singapore/Police Force
15)Heydi Lee/Singapore/Doctor[Wide Range Of Skills]

Now the edits are in BLUE.

15 Position Charts(Worldwide)
1)Joshua Rodrigues/Singapore/Serial Killer
2)Riana Sim/Singapore/Air Stewardess
3)Felicia Khoo/Singapore/Service Industry
4)Faye Chan/Singapore/Artist
5)Samantha Kow/Singapore/Style Artist or Color Coordinator
6)Monika Szennyes/Australia/Biker Chick
7)Knaphew Celine/Thailand/Photographer
8)Samuel Ng/Singapore/Logistics Officer
9)Leandra Quek/Singapore/Greenpeace Activist
10)Christian Ringer/Canada/Restaurant Owner
11)Feiwen Yeo/Singapore/Professional Gamer
12)Esther Koh/Singapore/Teacher[Speciality Subjects]
13)Sara Sharlett/Korea/Soldier
14)Eugene Ho/Singapore/Police Force
15)Heydi Lee/Singapore/Doctor[Wide Range Of Skills]

Overall, this does not represent the position of intelligence or any form of positioning(Phhff... I mean, come on, Joshua's listed as number 1).

Moving on...

To satisfy the curiousity of the readers on MSN Messenger. I've done more than interview a Satanist. Vote which one you want next on the TAGBOARD. Or, message me on MSN. But TAG first. You can choose from:

i) The Toyol Investigation
ii) Magick
iii) Wicca With Britt
iv) Psionics Canada
v) Cemetary at Midnight
vi) Silence in Tanjong Katong
vii) Drain Running
viii) Apartment #08-190

Moving on...

As for the title of this post? Type that into the search box in YouTube.

By the way, the silencing code is I-L-F. Dual meanings to that. But other than the obvious one people figured out. There is an alternative. Can be used to memorise D&T terms too.

For Komander Sora.

2007-04-02T21:39:00.000+08:00

Aights, have a look at my school exercise book.

Check out the border. Here's a closer look.

See the words at the bottom? They are mostly names. Mostly.

Monika. (Told ya I'll do an entry dedicated to friends. You being one.)

Felicia. (Khoo. Not Tan. Or... That.. *If ya read this, what's your surname again? Anyway, not you.*)

Samantha. (Yes, Samantha Kow, not that.. tuition.. bitch. *if that tuition bitch is reading, yes you're a bitch.*)

Faye. (One and only right? I don't think I know any other Faye(s). )

Amanda. (I'd like to point out, A.Kee is my cousin. A.Lim is a friend. Former. Friend. This, is about Kee.)

Stephanie. (Army chicks are hot, aye? Remember to e-mail while when you get down to vacation planning in Singapore, I'll show ya around.)

Aye, guess we are done with previews.

But... Note this.

There's blank spaces. Let me know if I missed anyone out. Or if you think your name isn't here. Yet.

You know you're chinese when...

2007-03-31T17:13:00.000+08:00

Are you a walking Chinese drama cliche?
Do you make overly exaggerated noises when you punch someone? Example "Ka-Da-Bish!"?
Is your life very much like something you've seen on Channel 8?
Then you are in luck, my friend!
For today we have a solution for you.
What you are suffering from is known as 笨蛋 Syndrome.
This is serious, very serious. Because 8 Days has inaccurate synopsis reviews.
This may cause you to die on Monday when the script really calls for you to die on Wednesday!

How did I realise this was a problem? Well, I woke up one morning and went downstairs to get a cup of coffee.
In that time frame, my elder brother got stabbed by a masked madman, my grandfather,没还钱, got harrassed by loansharks. My cat,找不到, ran away from home, my sister,来摸我, got raped by a married man, my mother got robbed and my dad got scammed! All in the 10 minutes I was buying coffee with milk, extra sugar.

Funniest thing too. While all this happened at 9 in the morning, my grandmother only called me the next day at 5 in the evening. Its like she felt she could help the situation before it got out of hand. But like she could. I mean, it says here in the back of my 8 days magazine she'll die next Thursday.

So to start my little search, I called SPCA to find my cat.

“SPCA？我的猫不见了。”
“你的猫什么名字？”
“找不到。”
“我知道，但是，你猫什么名？”
“说过了。找不到！”
“妈的！你做这东西干什么，浪费我时间！”
“你说什么？”
“去跳楼吧！”

The nerve of that son of a bitch. What did I ever do to him?

Anyway, back to the family, which has apparently disappeared for 3 weeks without reference or notice. I'd find that strange except I'm suddenly the boss of a B grade restaurant no one ever eats at, but somehow makes profits to fund my lifestyle. Ironically, the staff is only in the restaurant for roughly 10 minutes before we take a break and do a headcount to find out who got kidnapped. Mr Lee, the janitor, got kidnapped just last week, we found him in a secluded forest where no one would look. Except us. We'll look. Because we care for the welfare of our employees. Besides, I didn't feel like having to do the paperwork and reporting the matter to the police, who apparently don't need to be concerned with this matter at all, since my band of 8 street bums-turned-waiters can handle any problem.

I don't even know why I hired them! We don't prepare food, we just figure out old recipes let by my greatgrandmother who passes away, keeping the secret to her overweight selfish self. Imagine that. And we don't even have to wash plates! They somehow wash themselves or disappear somewhere.

Remember my sister,来摸我, the one who got raped? Well, her husband died of an unspecified accident, but no worries, I didn't have to talk to the slacker-not-appearing policemen, only a doctor, who can hardly tell the difference between cancer or a sprained ankle. Doesn't matter either, when you're chinese, only one family member gets cancer, and will die quite quickly and painlessly. Since my grandmother has cancer, I'll be ok.

Anyway, my brother-in-law died, but he's ok. My sister's just traumatised but he'll definitely be back as a ghost after he claims "true love" for her and all the crap. Always happens. Gee, anyone can die at this point of time. That's ok though, I'm sure if I die I can battle God, or whoever is running hell. Sure he can squish me like a little bug, you'd think so since I'm merely mortal but he's only the SUPREME BEING! But hey, I'm chinese. I can fight him off with a chalk duster and broom handle.

Oh, you'll have to excuse me for now, my brother's trying to commit suicide and my cat was found in Penang so I'll probably have to give a reward.

Journal Report #1 : Satanism

2007-03-25T12:54:00.000+08:00

Ok, in my spare time, I did interviewing jobs for a group of people collecting "hidden" data about stuff people won't talk about. Paranormal or otherwise, I was there to ask first hand what it was like to be in, say, a cult.

Of course, it wasn't compulsory that I had to join to infiltrate. Either way, my first job was to investigate claims of "toyols" or demonic unborn children. But we'll do that another time, since I never completed the questionings cause the guy who was asking around for me got injured in a car accident so we won't go in to that just yet. Not that the accident had anything to do with his line of work, it was just his unlucky day.

Moving on, the second report was a little Q&A with a representitive of CoS (Church of Satan).

Natural stereotyping will probably dress him in a black robe with crimson trimmings and hood. Maybe a red tint to his eyes and sharp claws.

But alas, nothing cool.

Plainly dressed, green workshirt and tie. Black pants and shoes. Wearing a student's spectacles although he clearly was above 20 years old. This was clearly not expected. My fellow assistants for the day was Darren and Christian. Someone was a little jumpy that day. Carrying a Good News Bible in one hand and a bottle of water in the other. Christian kept to himself. Quiet. Hard to tell from his expression but he was ready to stick the satanist in the heart if he so much as whispered a chant.

Ok, fine, I was nervous too. If he was in fact going to wear a robe and we're going to sit in a McDonalds talking, this wasn't going to go well with the public.

He brought a friend too. Some lower rank fellow. Forgot what he called him but sure wasn't "Acolyte". Maybe I played too much Warcraft the previous night and was expecting someone to be called an acolyte.

Started with the casual chatter. Jared, as he referred to himself and his friend, who I also forgot his name.

Apparently they don't exactly live the life we all might assume. They

(To Be Continued...)

Clarification

2007-03-17T03:21:00.000+08:00

Ok, just so ya know, my surname is "Tempestt Tan". Not *just* "Tan". "Avery" 's my middle name and "Ansel" being first. This would make "Guo Qiang (Wade-Giles : Kok Chiang)" just a chinese name. However since my chinese family name is "Chen" that would probably be "Tan" alone. But just to clarify with some asshole who assumed that it was just that, its not. It's "Tempestt Tan".

Side note, I don't think "Tempestt" has a chinese equivalent.

"Magico, call me El Presidente." - Kiver

2007-03-10T21:59:00.000+08:00

Alright, where to begin? Sorry didn't post any blog entries for awhile, pray you're still reading. First up, worked at the National Library for a week. Along with Alston, Andrew, Devesh and Nicholas. Now, librarians are nice people. The "brain" behind its operation consists of Serene, Joyce, Sundari and Rozana. They didn't seem that nice at first but later on they were very friendly. NOW HOLD IT! I know you don't wanna read the whole crap on how moving boxes and hurting my back, so I shall skip to more interesting parts. Wanna know what happened? Keep reading. Its the most amount of fun you can have without taking your clothes off.

First up, this "fine" book I found, titled, "Goodbye Mousie". Now, what does it sound like?
a) A magical mouse on a journey of self discovery?
b) A mouse who travels the world to find his meaning?
c) A dead rat.

And Ta-da its not a OR b! It's c! Honestly! Have a look.

This is the actual "summary" on the back of the book:
"When I woke up this morning, I tickled Mousie's tummy. But Mousie didn't wake up"

I read those words and was thinking to myself. In a silent, calm yet in a more morbid way. I don't know. It's really more a "WHAT THE FUCK WAS THE WRITER THINKING?!" manner.

Next, this is an actual quote from my friend. Do this in a indian accent to find it funny.
"I swear, you're the kind of guy who will grow up to be a drunk, smoker and probably, a wife beater. Then, one day, when you come home drunk, you yell, where the fuck's my TV? Where the fuck's my beer? Why the fuck's my couch a different color?! Then when you see people in the back you run in and beat the shit out of them, and suddenly you say, oops! Many apologies, I live next door, wrong house, sorry! Then when you stumble to your house you check in, Dar-Ling?! Where is my coffee? And why don't you wear something else? And after she gives you the coffee you sip and spit it out. Dar-Ling... You call this coffee? Taste like horse piss. Now, Dar-Ling. We must talk. You know what happens when my coffee sucks. Its that time. Fetch the baseball bat, Dar-Ling. We must make sure this doesn't happen again."

And that, is seriously, twisted.

To be continued. But just a note.

2007-03-05T23:38:00.000+08:00

CoS Chatlog. Darren versus Administrator #1.

"Are you implying that I am biased?"
"No, sir, I am not. You are much worse."
"Explain your reasoning."
"A liar and a deceiver are two different people. They share a common goal, to conceal their actions beneath a blanket of lies and deception respectively. The defining difference is method and motivation."
"And how, if I may pry, do you conclude that. Seeing as how lying and deceiving are similar by definition?"
"You see, a liar will tell you 1 plus 2 is 6. A deceiver will tell you cyan is blue. Cyan is a shade of blue, albeit lighter shade, but it is not considered blue, close, but not close enough. If I met a liar, he shines like a neon sign in hell. But if I met a deceiver, he is but a shadow in a dim room, I could rat him out but that would be too much work to reveal a small secret."
"You're avoiding my main questions."
"Or so I make it seem."

Paper toys

2007-02-25T18:36:00.000+08:00

Hey everyone! Been bugged to update the blog by quite a few people but I really wanted to make sure it was worth reading. Or in this case, watching.

And lastly, this is a recording. I didn't play the bass section cause there wasn't enough keys.

Red Mist In The Air

2007-02-15T01:00:00.000+08:00

Valentines Day, 1996. Me and Bert were not bothered by the event. We were kids. Smart kids who knew the difference between offending Sam or Faye. One would break and steal your heart and perhaps eat it after she rips it from your chest. The other would still be casual and unfazed. Except she'll give you a cold stare for the next few days. Not like she meant it, but you'll get the idea. Either way, today was no different from other days. Arts and Crafts. All year round anyway. Making cards for your parents to show your affection.

Today, there was something different. Teacher Cindy decided to chill out with us in our 6 year old mind games. She'd always be the one to start the fun kicking. Amazing isn't it? Her sister was the exact opposite, attitude-wise. Looking back now, they probably can be considered different in presentation of personailty. One was the "cute" girl everyone would know in school. The other would be the "stricter", more disciplined one. Whichever way you define that, all that mattered was that Cindy was crashing in with our card planning.

Ok, so she was definitely more fun than Tammy. Hinting to us that Faye or Sam expected some kind of present. Flowers? Maybe. 6 year olds aren't the romantic type so we'll drop the picking flowers idea. Anyway, long story short, it was a bait for her little game. Trusting an adult as a messenger isn't a good idea. What can I say, she loved to play games, even if that meant twisting words to fit the rules and win requirements.

So that's the story for the "only" Valentine's ever with the rest of Playhouse K2 class.

Ah, yes, what happened to the rest of the class? Faye was found. So was Sam. That leaves Bert. Which, according to a source, its spelt Bertram instead of Bertrand. He might be right. Also, there's Wei Lun, Roy and that kid who was born in 1989 and taught me how to sharpen a pencil with a penknife when I was 5 years old. Tammy never let me near the penknives ever again after that.

Now, that fills up the spot for one point in 1996 as well as a small part of 1995.

What else to go? Memory work isn't that easy as 'O' Levels are coming up. Starting to forget more often. The point range right now is quite simple. Either study for 'O' Levels or attempt to recover older memory work from talking to friends. One way, there's old-fashioned elbow work to do up the study work and hopefully cram the work in a few months like Felicia and Darren have done. Which can give A1s for multiple subjects but risk losing out on stronger subjects which will become weaker from lack of attention. Or I could go for the basic skills which Faye taught back in 1995/96, whjch would save me time on studying and its a basic express route to minimal A2 for every subject without studying for it.

I know it seems simple. Mix them both with the basics and refining it with newer syllabus work. That, takes at least, 8 months. But I don't have 8 months to spare. Not right now.

On the other hand, the notes and test papers seem a little interesting. I'm not admitting I like E Maths but it can be fun if there's mood for it.

You have to know what I wanna know to let you know.

2007-02-07T18:35:00.000+08:00

"Gynecology : The study of dinosaurs." - Santa Maria

Courtesy of Brandon Dass.

Think of your own stupid entry title. Tired.

2007-02-04T10:27:00.000+08:00

Ah so where DID $300 go anyway?

Notice something? If no, then good. I'm hiding it properly. But just for you blog readers...
A hint.

Now ya see? That spare cable? Yep, hiding something under the keyboard.

Fun huh? Got loads more stuff hidden in the room. There's more photos for you to guess where the equipment is hidden. But that's next entry.

I promised someone an update. AB+ rocks? Support the movement. Just hand the blood over.

2007-01-31T21:47:00.000+08:00

[NOTICE: Partial content 'stolen' from other sources. Please check and visit the links =D. *So I don't get murdered for stealing XD*]

Sorry I didn't update and you were stuck playing with that stupid annoying panda in the extras page.

Let's review~

Remember the (We, The Citizens) photo entry?

My focus point is:

THIS!
YES! 3M's wunnerful new produck. (Picture taken from Felicia's blog)

I didn't realise just how much of a joke it was till now. I mean, it was a joke then but its a bigger one now.

To save you from me spamming your tagboard with continous weird tags, I'll just refocus the point here.

See that? No?

It says "Each hook holds 1kg". 1KG?! Strong huh? Gotta put it in context to be sick and weird.

Oh this is a screenshot of 3M's creative manager. (This is not my character/account.)

Off that topic...

So cute! No, I'm not gay. Select/Highlight the photo to see what I'm actually referring to.

Off the MapleStory content, there's this alarming bit of text you should read. Just twisted.

Got that? Good. Go kill PiinkS3rapHy.

-Fake Advertisment-

Stop WANKING~!

Everytime you masturbate, these fine gentlemen will kill a kitten.

Think of the kitten before you even think about going on a solo mission.

-EndOfAdvertisment-

Do you have a H chord?

2007-01-27T23:28:00.000+08:00

(Read the previous posts)

Sorry for not doing a proper update. Been extremely busy, sick and possibly coming down with a flu. I'll live, no worries. Except for people who actually have a problem, then worry about that, cause I'll get you, someday, on this blog. For now, there are several posts meant for different people. You should know which paragraph applies. Starts, now. (Edit note: someone's note has been removed and sms-ed instead since its of greater degree of importance =).

(Notes 1-5 have been read and removed as of 3.00a.m.)

Back to the normal presentation.

I'd just like particular Joshua to note that he really should take better care of his friends. Not referring to myself or anyone immediately close, but people you know are capable of achieving much more than you put them out to be. Whispering words cannot hide intention from the eyes of those who seek the answers out. The point is, you can dream all you want about success. But as someone told me at a funeral, people who make you out to who you are today, are the people attending that funeral. It's not what you know, it's who you know.

But I guess I've learnt a lot more about people. Appreciating friends, even those you hardly know. Everyone is capable of at least one destructive or useful function. That's a sure thing. As they would put it. A function can create or destroy. Just what function do you intend to serve? Or do you feel you are more capable than that. Quite honestly, most people are capable of performing better.

This may hurt or help some people. But, to you, you might only have so many abilities. But to others around you, they'll see what you don't and believe it or not, this makes you a cut above the normal people. In a sick view of the world, uniqueness is counted as a glitch in the system. However, a glitch does help some people who abuse that, doesn't it? Then again, when people rely on glitches too much, who's controlling who? The glitch or the normal?

As for me, well, all I'm good for is helping to point out things like this. Beyond that, nothing else.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, All my base, Are belong to you.

2007-01-27T01:49:00.000+08:00

Bored. (Reupdate soon) in a few hrs.

This is one for the crowd.

2007-01-25T21:22:00.000+08:00

["ショウーkunn" is the current top player, Japan at level 200 hermit.]

Anyway, people have been bugging me to update, not just one I see. More than that, but I always ask, why not ya help me update?

For this, you should know. We get a total of 10 years of education, compulsory. No less. In other countries, they are not forced the full 10 years, but rather just a minimal 6. Or less. Who am I talking about? What am I getting at here? Get the full story of an australian girl I got to know in 2003. Then you'll know the difference between Singapore, versus, the world.

A Light Refraction

2007-01-16T19:23:00.000+08:00

The Precision Complex (Click here for the extension)

Don't ask me about Sciences. Sort of sucks.

Let's see about today, the 16th of January. Well, I did my friend's maths homework. Felt great. Felt easy. Haha. That's all cause I've got a good "teacher". Yep I'll say it, ____'s a great teacher! I'd refer all of you to ____, except that this year we're all doing O levels so sorry to say, sorry for you, good for me, the more F9s you guys get and the better my grade is, the points are worth more. Evil, I know. But since all my good friends are done with O levels I can wish the rest of you go to hell. But... Nah, we'll not let loose all curses and ill-wishes (till closer to the actual date). Some say they can go from C5 to A2. I say, that's great. But what I have is F9 to B3. If you think getting a A2 from a C5 is hard, you're dead wrong. Deader than Walt Disney wrong. Improvement is easier than relearning. (By the way I still owe you chocolates. Haha. We'll see aye?)

Back to real-time life. In class today, one classmate complained about how his girl left him all on his own during the holidays. Sitting on his ass all day growing fat on cheese-. WHOA! DAMN! Growing fat? On CHEESE?! He doesn't like CHEESE?!!! That's BLASPHEMY! SACRELIGIOUS! HERETIC! I'll have you know cheese just so happens to be the next more versatile thing to chocolate. Why? For starters, males aren't too good with handling the stress on the throat caused by chocolates, that being the reason why we have girls to eat them for us. Looking cute while doing so is optional and a case-by-case basis.

Next, cheese is the answer to everything! Cheese is x! x is more than -infinity but less than or equal to infinity! Unlike, chocolate, too much cheese will induce nausea and violent vomitting. But its a minor side-effect.

However, you should probably stay away from Blue Cheese. It's not natural and looks funny.

Hang in there. A slip in the belt.

2007-01-12T15:06:00.000+08:00

[Reference to previous post]

There goes another family member. Expect to attend a funeral a year at this rate. Sorry I didn't update it. Was too busy. Maths is really getting addictive. Fun? Maybe in the near future but not just yet. But I'll bet you guys never thought government run neighbourhood schools have it way better? Technically we've got it made in St Patrick's (I hate st. pat's but that's another story for tomorrow) or CHIJ, but other schools are getting it way better. Better books, (and judging from my current set) better teachers.

The Mathematical Complex

2007-01-11T00:52:00.000+08:00

(This post will be updated again soon. Therefore this is temporary just to make you whiners happy. *Update is in approximately 16 hours*)

Ever had a dream so visually appealing it felt real? Dreamers and realists are a happy bunch either way. But get this, how about life, when it feels so alive that you believe that you'll wake up tomorrow and every little detail that led up to this point, dissolves. So what's my point? Keep watch or read this page on the 12th of January 2007...

Tonight sky so clear, stars shining bright, fall asleep with you showered in soft moonlight.

2007-01-07T02:58:00.000+08:00

(Watch this blog for newer updates coming soon over Pro.S2 progress.)
[[Calling all artists and creative designers. Think you got the talent? Draw a logo and we'll see.]]

Ah, back to school. Smell that sweet scent of burning asphalt in the morning. The morning rush hour. No, not about the traffic, its all about getting even a standing spot on a bus 12 or 55. Not a pretty sight seeing 80+ people crammed in a bus built to hold 50+. Ironically, bus 196 which has a route from Bedok to Clementi is not only less crowded, its near empty.

Talking about that. Incidentally, Bedok looks about the same as Clementi. As if the MRT station is built where the Bedok Library is. Imagine that, once you come out of the spot where the library is, THERE! It looks exactly like Clementi interchange. Princess in Bedok? There's a counterpart in Clementi. Both places are about the same too. Bunch of pervs and emo punk ass gangs.

[On to the other section.]

Why does emo suck so bad? No, emo does not stand for emotional. It stands for Emergency Machine Off switch. In short, that annoying red button you see on every machine in the D&T lab. Why is it there? What good is pressing it if the machine chopped off your fingers already? Who even thought of doing that instead of just pulling the plug? That's what emo is for. Redundant and should be removed from the system. Wrist/Skin cutting ain't cool. Wish my hair was emo, then it would cut itself.

So much for punk rock. Smoking's not part of the gig either. For all you know you could be smoking some poor girl's used tampon. Like you'd know the friggin difference when you're high on smoking blood or dog poo. Way to go asswipe. This is what happens when you support one-hit wonder talentless bands like Simple Plan. Between punk rock and a Philips vacuum cleaner, guess which has more suck power. No duh.

I have thunder in my heart, lightning in my veins.

2006-12-30T01:06:00.000+08:00

Ok I promised a few people who promised a few people to tell their friends that there was going to be a long post just about insulting people. Well, guess what? Yes! Actually, no. I'm just kidding, its not today. I'm tired. First time saying that before someone else had the chance to say that (*aww* inside joke, don't ask).

However I will, under such circumstances, give you some sharp tongue for the fun of it.

#1 : Annoying Bloggers/People
First, and I'm sure I'm not the only one, there are increasing amounts of annoying prick wankers who type in a manner of "Use your brains, oh wait, I forgot! You don't have brains." or something along those lines. Well, fuck you. Fickle minded sons of donkey fucking whores. It's either you state your claim that your target does have brains or doesn't. Not one then the other. Slack up on drinking your own piss and learn to talk like any other sane person.

#2 : Old People Who You Don't Know Randomly Complain
Sure, some say old people have the right to bitch cause they are fossils and therefore have more experience. But this is not the case. I'm not interested in listening about how his parents got killed or raped by Japanese soldiers in 1940s. For instance if I ask where's Coffee Bean, you damn well tell me where in Satan's unholy rectum where the hell is Coffee Bean. I'm very prone to anger strikes without a shot or two of caffine. Caramel optional.

#3 : Gamers With No Social Lives
No, I don't care if your MapleStory priest is level 3 million or more. How you can make 80 kills on DOTA. Or get 200 frags on Condition Zero. Unless I actually talk to you a lot, in which case, if I don't talk that much, that means I don't care. Get a life. Really.

#4 : Teen Smokers
Oh, cool, let's all suck on a clogged up paper straw. Especially a certain few St Patrick's students. If you wanna suck on anything, Katong Convent girls have a better deal for you. More like Australian Kissing. Its like French Kissing, but DOWN UNDER. (Australian Kiss line courtesy of Monika Szennyes. The one on the left.)

#5 : Military Freaks
This, I really don't care about how much you know about German tanks. Someone should just pull down your Panzers and kick you in the turret.

That just about wraps it up for today.

Don't **** with the addiction.

2006-12-26T00:08:00.000+08:00

DJ Max Portable rocks. Its addictive. People are addictive too. Not gonna say who. Addictive. Feliz Navidad~! Sorry for the rushed post. Off to play more DJ Max~

BETA TEST: Toilets

2006-12-18T18:05:00.000+08:00

[BETA TEST: Posts with this BETA TEST header is meant for experimental purposes. If you think its funny/great, tag on the tagboard your comments. If you like it, it will go full time.]

People do the strangest things in front of babies and toilets. Those handicapped cubicle hogs just want extra space but our lady friends ain't got the pleasure of pissing standing up. They could do that, but they'll wet their pants and socks.

Below is a fun test. MEANT FOR GUYS! Girls, don't do the test, please. Its simple, there are 3-4 urinals but more than one place to stand, choose one to stand and take your piss. NO CHEATING!

Guess this one. There are 3 urinals. Where would you stand?

Question 2. Same thing as above. Did you learn from your mistakes?

This is question 3. Enjoy.

Question 4.

Question 5.

Question 6.

Last question.

Wasn't that fun? Check your answers here. If you got it right, add 0 to your score for each question. If its wrong, add 1 for each wrong answer.

If you got 0 for everything, well done, you're a man. Or a very frightening girl. If you are a girl, you know too much.

If you got any score higher than 0. 1 and above. You're either a girl who didn't listen and did the test anyway, a gay man or you're lacking in the testosterone department.

Next section's for everyone to read. Girls, you are forewarned. You'll KNOW too much. Stop here if you wanna keep yourself in suspense.

At the end of a piss, there are several kinds of people. Let's review.

Usually there's no queue. We're not girls. We don't talk or need to sit down. But some do weird things during the "clean-up" phase.

The Flicker: I think most of us are like that. After pissing, one or two flicks with the master-writing hand usually clears stuff up and we leave with piss on our non-flicking hand.

The Spitter: After he takes his piss he just has to spit in the urinal or he leaves unhappy. Instead of the ordinary Flick, he gathers a glob of spit and attempts to aim for the drainage hole. Usually he fails the the spit lands on his dick's head. Which sucks cause now he's got two things to clean up. This is followed by a curse-word in the person's native language. Lazy ones just stuff it back in and walks off. Not very clean considering the spit's now on his underwear. The clean freaks wouldn't even spit in the first place.

The Wanker: Ok, this is really only noticable from the back and the sides. After he's done, his version of the Flick is comparable to that of wanking. He might actually grab it and attempt to rid the excess piss through vigorous wanking. This is especially disturbing if you're behind him waiting to use the urinal.

The Extreme Flicker: Now, this guy. He's normal. He's like a flicker but he does it in such a way the piss ends up on his face or shirt. Caution, if you're next in line, usually doing his exercise ends up with him leaving hair on the sides. Creepy.

The Mid-Streamer: This guy is the idiot who will attempt to flick it while he's peeing. Not very smart. It ends up flying in more directions than you think. If you're next to him, you might wanna consider cleaning up your shorts too.

The Noise Box: You won't see this very often. But you'll damn well hear it. You might think you're safe in a cubicle. But this guy thinks he's the only one in the toilet. After peeing he'll make all sorts of sounds ranging from an ahhh to a urgh. If neither of these noises are present, he'll cough at least thrice.

So now you know. You have been warned.

Ace of Spades. 9 of Clubs. That's my hand. You've got a Queen of Hearts and a hidden card. Your call

2006-12-13T16:45:00.000+08:00

Hey, check this video out. Someone sent me the link and I thought its not that bad. Shock didn't like the song, and I partially agree cause its hard to hear. But even if you guys don't have speakers or if they aren't working (*cough*), just click 'Play' anyway. Its nothing emotion-evoking or thought-inspiring but its just a casual thing. Have fun and don't cry (*cough cough*). *Yeah actually the coughs are referring to people but its a code now! One cough for someone. Two coughs for someone else. Easy to understand?(*cough cough cough*). Good.

Fun wasn't it? *this post ends here. will be updated soon*

Flor Das Aguas

2006-12-11T03:52:00.000+08:00

Attended 2 "concerts" over the weekend. Marco Pereira and Juan Martin. Well, suffice to say, as fun as it was, I picked up a few score sheets. Autographed too =). But with the name spelt as "To Tempest", that ain't too good haha.

There was this family on the train there too. Funny! This guy's daughter was playing around the pole, she's like 5, and we were saying she's gonna be a poledancer, when the father, who was sitting far from us said the same thing and his wife was smacking him for his comment haha. Well, someone better be content with his daugter's occupational choice. Cause with a comment like that he ain't gonna get any other daughters... or sons... if you get the drift.

Kinda bored though. Some friends are working and others are busy doing something... no details, aye?

The product of Boredom+Blog is shown below.

I'm taking a neutral approach to this situation.

2006-12-07T01:40:00.000+08:00

[I KNOW MORE THAN ONE PERSON'S READING! TAG! OR DIE!]
*Note: If you chose death, tag first, then kill yourself.

Stupid blogger. If I wanted my goddamn blog migrated anywhere I would have used Xanga/Diaryland/LiveJournal. Nevermind. Its ok. I understand you Google people have itchy fingers. Its ok. You're gonna lose money from YouTube anyway.

Duh, people making stupid videos of themselves by taking a photo of themselves everyday for x times 10 to the power of infinity years and compiling into a video is a stupid idea. Why? First of all, if you've got nothing better to do than take a photo of yourself in the morning, edit it all afternoon and clipping it to your video right before you go to bed. You need a life. Or a girlfriend. Or take up wanking as a competitive sport. Just don't get frictional burns. Point is. You're lame.

Anyone seen the DOHA 2006 games? Disgusting to watch the matches and Singapore lose miserably. Table tennis sucks. Its a gay sport. You know why? Cause there's no rationale to running from one end of the width of the table to the other end just to hit a little cheap-china manfactured ball which you probably believe holds some ping-pong genie which grants your every wish, should you actually win the stupid match. Play tennis. No one wants to see some stupid table tennis match but people love Maria Sharapova. So that's that.

Swimming's also a disgrace. Reiko Nakamura seems to be winning it all. Team Singapore should just pack up and come home to sell duck rice next to the 7-11 Taufik Batisah was abducted at to make low budget Gulp commercials. You know what. Singapore should be like China. Spam atheletes. That way you can have a 8 man team of swimmers in a 8 man match. That way you WILL get Gold, Silver and Bronze. That's the basic idea.

Yes this post is the result of withdrawal effects. Withdrawal Symptoms of what? You go guess.

Pull up a chair and take a seat

2006-11-29T23:57:00.000+08:00

YAY! 16 today! Haha. Ok logically, in an illogical world, Felicia *would* technically be the first to say Happy Birthday since she started at 11pm 28th November. In a rationale sane world, Samantha, aka SnowSugar would be the "first" since he wished at 12.02am. In real world terms, Jia Wei, aka ShockMyFoes would have been the first since he said that at 12.15am.

In any sense of the word, -Miracles-, would have been the 'extreme' first since he said it like... MONTHS before.

Anyway... Faye's birthday's in exactly a month! 29th December. Nice hor? How many *former* good friends would have a birthday just a month after?

Aside from that, *PhOtoS!*

Took this at VivoCity, the DivineOnes Guild =)

Edited by feizai3 =D

Nice B-Day Pressie! ^.^

Well, its been a fun day. Gotta go sleep now. Cya~!

Looking for puzzle solvers. 1000s of pieces.

2006-11-18T23:32:00.000+08:00

Veterans will know how to complete this puzzle. If you don't know, Fractured Image is the scrambled words that aren't in the correct order or even make sense. Partially Taped is a set of words, partially related to Fractured Image but not the same. Space Fillers will partially fill in the blanks for Partially Taped to make it make sense. However it is not complete. Words and sentences from Fractured Image aren't used. They need to be added in to complete the word scramble. Don't ask me. I don't know the answer.

Fractured Image

Everything for that day. Went alright. One night, one run. What's your fear? Someone special. Makes me feel different. I don't know. You tell me. Yeah. And tomorrow I'll wake up. What made you any more special. I'm sure you're one to say. Do you know her name? If everything revolves around this complex. When did one plus one become my problem? Tonight's the night when the 6th bullet fires. I know this is true. Do you believe? Godsend. What went wrong? Which was the greater good then? I didn't ask for this. A red tie affair. A suit and a couple of buttons. Spare me to intricate details. All a mistake. 16? 17? When was that? My record's clean.

Partially Taped

Tonight's the night. Where did I make mistakes? Hard to think. What's your fear? Do you know mine? I sleep tonight and when I wake up tomorrow morning that is the lie in itself. Do you know her name? I think it was ....... . Anyway I can't tell you. Not tonight. Do you know me? No? I'll tell you. Fact is, you're not supposed to know. Not now. Not yet.

Space Fillers

It's 7 in the evening. Tired. Gotta wonder how anyone every finds the energy to wake up every morning. I guess I sleep the earliest then? Point is, tonight's the night I question my rationale behind everything. Where did I make mistakes and how am I going to pay for them? I find it hard to think about such things. The fear of the unknown. What's your greatest fear? I glance to my left and the person who I see is the most important to me in the world. You may not know this but its a divine intervention when I suddenly realise how important a single female can be. I know what she's afraid of. I know your fears. Do you know mine? Let's put it this way. Sounds sappy. But its true. I might just figure, tonight, I simply go to sleep tonight and when the sun rises tomorrow morning I just realise my life is the lie itself. If so, I believe dreams are better than real life. She's beautiful. Do you know her name? I do. Should I tell you? Not a chance. When did I meet her? I think it was ....... . Anyway I can't tell you. It's not good to spoil endings. Not tonight. I know who you are and what you do. Do you know me? The answer to that is the complex itself. Believe me? No? Fine. I'll tell you something. Fact is, this isn't the way it will go. It can never be 100% certain. In fact, you're not supposed to know about this. But I'm risking it for you. When will you know? Not now. At least, not yet.

About last night... Oh wait... Later.

2006-11-18T23:00:00.000+08:00

Attention. Er. Everyone. I have realised it is not good to procrastinate and put work off to another day and do work last minute. As such I have typed out why doing so is bad.*

*I'll do that later. See ya!

Kidding! Side note.

Ever had to give your seat to a pregnant lady? Well, I found out that there are reasons NOT to give it up, unless of course, you know her.

You see, some chicks are so ugly, God already gave them someone who actually DOES selflessly love them and blah blah. So she should be thankful. BUT THIS? A SEAT?! Ok, now THAT's going to far. Getting pregnant might be a natural thing. But seats are not so keep them. The upside to all this is, to the baby, all it cares about is what it wants to do. Which is float in a liquid sack. Does it give a shit if mommy's sitting down or BASE jumping off Niagra Falls? Think about it.

Ok evil. I know. I'm gonna go to hell for that. Does have a small point though haha.

Photo Entry. Shameless. Uncut. Unedited.

2006-11-01T01:29:00.000+08:00

Part I

Dear Faye, This is Playhouse. Or at least, it WAS.

Anyway, moving on. This is my aunt Vivian.

For a person who can swear in Hokkien, her English is fantastic. This is my mum and Zacchaeus.

Zacchaeus is aunt Vivian's son. Cute lil' guy. This right here is James.

He's my cousin too. Today we walked around VivoCity. Boring. But, photos!

The view is fan-friggin-tastic! Lil' Zacchaeus got some more shutter time.

Hope he'll remember all this many years down the road. Toys'R'Us is huge!

I think Geoffrey's a sick giraffe. Some stuff is his "recommendation".

For the price of that shit I might as well go Candy Empire, aye? Geoffrey only picks expensive stuff.

Join Jerry Maguire in screaming "show me the money!" from all his twisted crap.

Yep. Kinda like that. The place I'm staying at right now is in Lorong Ah Soo. Quiet.

And last photo for today is that creepy tiger.

Yucks. Honestly disgusting. Revolting. More pictures in Part II. See ya!

We, The Citizens...

2006-10-30T01:08:00.000+08:00

The photo entry...

We interrupt this shameless broadcast of stupid photos of this blog's author, his family and his friends. Instead we bring you even more shameless news from our MapleSEA News Reporter who is biased in every way and his views are racist and basically unfit for normal news broadcasts. For now we have an urgent news entry from our correspondant in MapleSEA, Kiver.

xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx

Prepare, people, sit back, relax, get some popcorn and read away!

First off,

Following that rule I will abide by that and prove everything or whatever I can.

3M, that company, is a little sick as of late.

That bear sure looks happy. No kidding they sell this shit right here in sunny Singapore.

Less talk, more pictures, aye?

I will be the guide for this lovely evening. Kiver's got a nice friend.

Feizai's cute. Want a photo?

Cute hor? Haha. SnowSugar's cute too but I can't say that too much or I'll get killed.

Anyway, the deal is.

Nice rings. I'd use the diamond for quest but i'll get yelled at. I think NeVrE's angry.

Don't know why. That rifle looks pretty nifty. Anyway we all hate RoxyBoy.

He's a real ass. He says he needs a Maple Girlfriend/Wife too. We know what he really wants.

I think some people get the idea.

Maybe not.

I wanna hunt him down. In this way.

People say guns are bad. Doesn't matter. I can be silent.

Stalk him. Or we could work around the fact about doing it ourselves.

If he doesn't like it he can move out.

But anyway I wonder why my clothes don't stink. Or any Maple clothes either.

Ah I see the label. Guess that's how we keep clean.

This is your news reporter, Kiver, signing out.

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Next time, photo entry.

The Press, My Dear Friends, Is Going To Have A New Wave.

2006-10-24T01:49:00.000+08:00

Catch this, I'm awake at 2am in the morning training a MapleStory character. I'm not moody or anything. Just way too sleepy. I remember this, a year ago, about someone, lets not say any names now huh, who I had to wake up every morning and log in to MapleStory at 10am just to check if she's back cause she didn't give me her phone number to sms. Haha. Well, no one else will know about that. Anyway, a year is gone, friends are gone. People got wasted and stuff.

I had a friend who I knew was from Ohio from his IP address. But he claimed he was in Japan. Total bullshit but I went with it. Suffice to say, his command of the Japanese language was comparable to that of gibberish from a 2 year old. Anyway, my dear friends, I too, can teach you Japanese. Repeat after me.

Grin Kar-Er
Broo Kar-Er
Prink Kar-Er
Rape Kar-Er
Ye-Row Kar-Er
Or-Leng Kar-Er
Per-Per Kar-Er

Good?

What does that mean, you ask?

Grin Kar-Er (Green Color)
Broo Kar-Er (Blue Color)
Prink Kar-Er (Pink Color)
Rape Kar-Er (Red Color)
Ye-Row Kar-Er (Yellow Color)
Or-Leng Kar-Er (Orange Color)
Per-Per Kar-Er (Purple Color)

Now you know wise Confuse-Us wisdom. Run along.

"Ya see. On one hand we have a serious problem. On the other hand. I... have different fingers."

Next post is a photo entry. So look out for it. See ya.

No Free Samples, Bitch!

2006-10-23T11:15:00.000+08:00

For those of you know Chun Kee. I got to say, he will be killed. For starters he tried to steal Friendster friends from my profile. Which is sad. Cause today, morning, received a lot of complaints. Let's see a few.

"your friend erm chun kee. viewed my friendster profile!"
"wahhx eeurr fwen ssho sshuaiix"
"Haha idiot touch my friendster"
"YOU tell that sonofabitch not to touch my girl or he's gonna get whats coming"
"some spastic biatch looked at my frenstar. your fren. jus thot you shld know"

Right. Let's ignore the second one. Blind as a bat.

Next, he said my friendster profile was boring. Which it is. But you don't have to put so many things to play with. What the hell. I'm asking you to read it, not sit there and play with a flash animated picture. No free samples.

Kick me when I'm down

2006-10-17T00:25:00.000+08:00

"What's the range of room temperature?"
"Um. I... Zero K to anything you damn well want."
"What?! Mind you, its 20-25 celsius!"
"No its not."
"YES it IS!"
"No. My room, your room, his room. Different temperature. Is your air-con on?"

"Hey is this a general provision shop?"
"Yes what can I get you?"
"A vegetable."
"What kind?"
"Green one."
"And...?"
"Its a plant. Has leaves."
"What's the name?"
"I thought you said this was a general shop? I'm telling you in general!"

"Do you swear to tell the truth? The whole truth and nothing but the truth so help you God?"
"Sure. You're a fag. That chick's got huge boobs, I think blondes are stupid, I'm a racist."
"Huh? You're supposed to tell me what I want to hear. Not all that."
"Oh right. F**k you."

"Don't you just wish people would stop asking you questions?"

"I opened a drink stall once. Testers were free, a glass of the antivenom was 50 bucks a go."

"Ever notice that some girls paint their fingernails with correction fluid?"
"Yeah so?"
"In class, when they sleep. They look oh-so cute."
"Uh-huh..."
"Yeah. Then I write many spelling mistakes on their fingernails."

Someone's 16 and we've got a bottle of vodka surprise.

2006-10-12T23:47:00.000+08:00

To "Admiree"

Sorry if I haven't logged into MSN and stuff. O levels coming soon aye? So you probably need to study and you'll be busy so I dropped MSN from that point. But let me know if you need anything or something's up. Always free to help =). I'll try to make myself useful by levelling a character for you but not guaranteed. Somehow I can't fit in to using it. A bit on the funny feeling side since I'm always afraid you'll die or something like that.

Still, I will try one of these days when I get my plans underway =). Anyway if you scroll down from this notice there are a few jokes for you and stuff to keep you relaxed when you need it. Hope you like it.

P.S. The ELF club and FEL thing helped me during Design and Technology exam =P. I remembered very easily.

Signed,
"Kok Chiang"

Geez I hate the English informal letter format. I mean if it really IS informal and I can write to a friend can't I write everything in short form? Or in German or even Pig Latin? After all its my letter and its all about personalised letters. But no, they insist you write it in a certain way BUT stick to how they told you to write. See above? THAT'S an informal letter. What's informal without emoticons and casual writing? Even nicknames are used. But can I call my friend "Assface" and call myself "AATTKC" on MY informal exam letter? Noooo. MOE sucks! For the record, for EACH exam I LOST 3 minutes on writing my full name. No kidding.

On to the next section.

The air travel service in Iraq had been improved. Saddam Hussien himself decided to have a go and gathered his men and queued up to board a plane. When they reached the front the attendant took their passports, smiled and handed it back. When Saddam was happy with this he turned around to tell everyone how good he felt this was. But to his surprise everyone had disappeared! He asked the attendant what had happened and the attendant smiled again and said, "Well, Saddam, my good man, if you leave Iraq, no one else will have to leave!"

A guy wore a ski mask and jumped another guy coming towards him and pushed him into a dark alley. The guy said, "Give me all your money! NOW!" Then the other guy brushed himself off and said, "Do YOU know who I AM?! I AM TT DURAI! I RAN THE NKF! I can have you ARRESTED!" The robber thought for a moment and said, "Oh, NKF, right then. In that case. Give ME all MY money!"

Confucious say life should be like Minnie Mouse when Mickey Mouse not around. Fucking Goofy!

Class had just started and 3 students were late already. 2 guys and a girl. The first guy didn't have his shirt and the teacher asked who and where was he. He said, "Hi, My name's Darren and I was on top of Cherry Hill." The teacher told him to take a seat and asked the second guy, who didn't have his pants, the same thing. "Hi, My name's Adam and I was with Darren on top of Cherry Hill." The teacher told him to take his seat and turned to the girl, who was wearing ripped clothing, and the teacher said, "Let me guess I know where would you be judging from the other two. What's your name?" The girl blushed and replied, "Hi Teacher, My name's Cherry Hill."

A man was sitting in a bar. Handphone rang so he picked it up.
Man: "Hello?"
Lady: "Hi Honey! Guess what! I saw these really really cute pair of shoes for $500. Can I buy?"
Man: "Sure thing baby. Anything for you!"
Lady: "Ooh! Can I get a manicure too!?"
Man: "Nothing's too good for my precious."
Lady: "Wow! Can I buy that handbag I was eyeing since last week? Its dropped to just $700!"
Man: "Anything darling. Whatever makes you happy."
Lady: "You're the best! I love you!"
Man: "Love you too, Sweetheart!"
He put down the phone and sighed. Then yelled.
"HEY! Does anyone know who this handphone belongs to?!"

Someone has a birthday today. Doesn't take a genius to find out who.

2006-10-11T13:44:00.000+08:00

For the record...
I'm not going to do this sort of picture for anyone else. Seriously. This took 3 frickin hours to take pictures. Screw the remaining requests I don't wanna do this anymore!!!

Ok I'm just spastic. HAPPY BIRTHDAY FELICIA!

Directed at Miss Felicia Khoo only. That other girl, cough, Miss Rebecca IForgotTheLyingBitch'sSurname, Honestly she makes my blood boil really. Annoying. Irritating. Like a pimple on school dance night. Someone should just blast her brains all over Katong Convent and give it a nice reddish hue.

Psst... Its called a pincer welder. P-E-N-I-S-W-A-N-K-E-R. Got that?

2006-10-10T21:46:00.000+08:00

The title sounds really insane and incredibly lame but that's just the way Design and Technology examinations went.

Silver lining around his cloud of dreams.
So much for everything he built and made.
Life is unfair. So very unfair.
I question my job. My ideals.
But it is not my place to change anything.
God's will is equality and fairness among men.
Its just not our place. To advise. To question.
What must happen, will happen.
What is optional, it is negligible.
Come, let's take a walk. Let me show you.
Consequences and fantasy.

Cold. It hurts to feel. It hurts to watch.
But that is the way of life. All alone.
Shivers and struggles. Do not fear or worry.
Life has its own kinder side. For you, child.
Sleep, forever. To awake is to suffer further.
At daybreak your guardian will take you away.
Better, to much better places. Suffer no more.
There is still much to do. Make haste.

Does this feel better? Warmth. Change. Care.
I'm sorry but this is part two of our journey.
Its not always the deprived that receive release.
Sometimes people need to let go.
With this night, I come, moving swiftly.
Prepare and repent. For no mercy is granted.
You shall breathe. But before that. Learn to forgive.
Hurt is not worth carrying. A useless load.

Any Questions?

2006-10-07T23:16:00.000+08:00

They always said the army would give me a hard life. Away from home. Marching alongside psychotic officers. Especially Lieutenant James. "Alright men, listen up. There's two ways for you to fight this battle. One way is by Highway 34 up that way. The other is my way, which I shall not reveal to you unless you specifically ask. So which do you prefer? Private Jay what's your choice?" He always was in a happy mood. "Your way, sir." Jay always was the curious type. I was no different. "Alright. *pulls out pistol from holster, cocks gun, points to Jay's forehead* The highway seems much better from your point of view now, right?" Sweat trickled down Jay's face. "Yes, sir!" He stumbled on his words. "Well, too bad, you had your chance. *pulls trigger* Anyone else prefers my way?" Well, as I said, James was always happy. Trigger-happy.

Ignore that if you don't get it or you don't understand the rationale behind it, I'll tell you about it some other time or if you ask. My day is starting to blow. As in really blow. I'm worried about my results. First time I'm worried in 10 years. There's a first time for everything I suppose.

The haze situation is or was PSI 150. Creepy if you think about it. First killer stingrays now killer Indonesian farmers. Next, we'll all get brutally mauled by Snoopy. Mark my words. You have no idea how many people are complaining that they are going to die or stuff like that. Stupid really. You can't exactly die from the haze unless you're weak in respitory functions but otherwise everyone should be ok.

数学。乱做。浪费我的时间。

2006-10-02T17:39:00.000+08:00

Mathematics tomorrow!Don't you get it? Its the FUCKING APOCALYPSE!
Anyway as zero hour approaches I've been doing some practice in the library. Great stuff. THen I came across an old worksheet in my file. Let's do that shall we? Its RME anyway.

1)List the 5 stages of grief that Dr Elisabeth Kubler-Ross has named:-
(Tough question)
1- Walk around a forest
2- Kill a few zombies
3- Buy new equipment
4- Rush for the cave
5- Slay the Boss Monster.
(NEXTTT!)

2a)What are your goals now?
Zero to nothing. No ball gets past me and I don't get any balls past them. No goals. Half time!

2b)What would make your life meaningful?
Aw how nice to ask. Let's see shall we?
[Life/laif/noun/plural lives/laivz]: Alive Not Dead. State of being alive.
Alright now my life has meaning.

2c)What would you very much like to do before you die?
Get mauled by hushpuppies/Snoopy/Garfield or find out how to solve a Rubik's Cube. Stupid plastic toy...

There. Done. All is well and we're all happy.

How sad. Dead and failing.

2006-10-01T21:15:00.000+08:00

"May 28 2006 at 8:00 in tha morning ayoung14yearold boy by tha name of Scott Jackson was found dead. Doctors could come up with no cause of death. His mother was going to check hisemail tosee if she could figure out wat happend.Turns outhe was still signed to myspace. Shefound hehadgone to sleep after he read and didn't repost a chain letter about a lil girl that kills u inyoursleep with no natrual cause of death.this is the bulletin he read..My name is Jaime Heras im 14 years old.im a massed murderer.i have no face went you look at me & u'll die immediately. U have 2 minutes to repost this or I will visit u tonite."

Seen this on Friendster? Well now, let's review.

A 14 year old died. Ok. Sure. Loads of them die anyway so just chalk one up for the supernatural team. Scott Jackson? Is he related to Samuel L. Jackson? If not then, no, I don't care about him. Oh wait, if he is, nope, don't care about him even so.

His mom's a smart bitch. Really. Checking his e-mail. Cause #1, she'd know his password. And heaven forbid my mom finds my MapleStory password. That'll be hard to explain(those or the two people who do know it will understand why). I CAN explain. No, wait, I can't.

Later, there's a 14 year old girl that kills you in your sleep. On the serious end, that is creepy, considering she is willing to climb up multiple flights to steps just to kill you in your HDB Block since most of the time it just ain't creepy to see a ghost in the lift. To a guy's point of view having a 14 year old, dead or undead girl visiting you at night while you're sleeping sounds pretty cool. For the girls, if its your kind of thing, then go for it. No one's gonna say its not ok cause she's dead and all.

Cause if that happens that really ought to be funny when they ask you to push the button for the say, 11th floor. What do you do then, really. She's got a knife and just looking straight ahead. Coughing here and there from time to time to kill the awkward silence. For those who live in private residences, well, consider seeing a ghost with your dog attached to its leg after the ghost got mistaken for a robber. Threats to kill you after it gets rabies shots. Or "I.O.U Death" coupons.

Look at her bulletin.

"My name is Jaime Heras im 14 years old.im a massed murderer.i have no face went you look at me & u'll die immediately. U have 2 minutes to repost this or I will visit u tonite."

No face? I don't care. Jaime Heras? Stupid name for a ghost but ok. I, personally, love her command of the English language. She's a "massed murderer". I suppose that's possible after she kills someone the rest run away so that's past tense.

I especially love the "U" and "tonite". I think she's an Ah Lian. Really. Maybe she comes in your room in a bright pink adidas sports jacket while on her handphone which is attached to about 30 different keychains. After you call her fat she replies something like, "No lorhxz. Donch be damn liddat lorxz. Budd I lurrbe euur Mickey Mouse picture worxz".

Creepy really.

The Classic Definition Of Suicide.

2006-09-29T19:28:00.000+08:00

First off. Did you know that Singapore is a free country? Free. Very free. It hands out the death penalty free too. No extra charge to be hanged. Kidnapping? Hang. Firing a gun? Hang. Murder? Hang.

I'm trying. Really. Trying to make someone feel better. My day is shit really. A spectacular pile of shit. Didn't matter whether I had fun or not, just coming back home, logging in on MSN, well, got me depressed. So I'm trying. Ok? Trying. Honestly. Sorry if you don't like it.

Really don't know what to say or do. Stuck at a fork on what is most important. I really tried to study maths. And I'm going to do ok. But if you're just going to be this way, I'll just fail just cause I'll worry. Really. I will. So relax a bit. Ok last try alright? One more chance?

An old man was talking to his nephew. He told his nephew.
"Oi. Boy ah. You know hor. I got an 18 year old thai wife and I oreddi 60 year old can make her pregnant. Good hor?"
His nephew was shocked and told him slowly.
"You ever hear that story of the man, his nephew and the lion?"
The old man said no. His nephew continued.
"Well, you see this family like to go vacation. Then one day a lion attacked them at their campsite. So what happen is, the man ran out with his walking stick instead of his gun and pointed it at the lion. He pulled the handle and you know what happen? The lion suddenly died!"
The old man was sure his nephew didn't take him for an idiot.
"What do you think I am? Stupid? The guy pointed the stick but his nephew shot the lion la!"
The nephew nodded and said.
"Ok. I'm glad you understood that. Now about your wife's pregnancy..."

Try 10 pounds of dark chocolate. Helps to remind you, Shut the fuck up.

2006-09-28T18:40:00.000+08:00

Something to start things off.

Picture this, at a bus stop, its raining heavily. You're in your ferrari. You see, at the bus stop, your perfect partner, an old lady and your best friend. But there's only enough space for 1 other person. A person once said, "I would get out of my car, give the keys to my best friend and ask him to drive the old lady home while I talk softly to my perfect partner." Sweet isn't it?

However the more efficient answer to give, which was suggested, is, "I would run the old lady over to put her out of her misery. Screw my perfect partner right there and drive off with my best friend for a beer down in a pub." Creative, no? Back to the entry.

Day of complaints and trails by fire.

Honestly, I've had it up to boiling point right now. Just when I was starting to like Maths. As in really like it, for once. I was bent on getting all the answers right that I suppose that was the challenge all the long but just when that happens my results come back and my mum just has to nag. Really.

Not Faye's brand of nagging where is actually constructive and helpful, its just a load of hot air escaping. If she had a point to it instead of speculations and assumptions, I'd give a damn. Really.

Let's just say it once and clear. If I NEVER played MapleStory and I NEVER used MSN. I WOULD HAVE failed miserably. Honest. My algebra would still suck. Its not 100% bulletproof right now but its of better standard. So for the love of all that is sacred, just for once, learn to accept that this is an alternative to work progress.

I'm not saying its instant results but graphical data PROVES that my MATHS, CHINESE, SCIENCES have IMPROVED. Even by a bit, that bit made a difference to me. You have no idea what its like to feel like you have a fighting chance in Maths after so long. From a very good student in this stuff I've failed cause I had lost my will to do very much.

That single thought from Secondary 1 to 3 is, "What happened to Faye?" Really. That was all I wanted to know. Know so badly, I would give up study time to research. And since now I know, I can go back to doing what I did best. Defying odds and predictions.

My odds were bad when I was Primary 4. I was literally going to fail and badly. But I quit tuition and ran off to learn on my own. Trusting only in myself, I succeeded in going against that tide. I won. That was a great feeling. Beating the system. I will do so again when I figure how. But I will.

Hypocrits and liars! Bunch of them. Not all. But some! That handful spoils the entire structure. My mum thinks being Catholic gives you the fucking right to believe what you will and make up shit about what being good is like. For the record I repect Jesus and everything BUT I don't have respect for certain people. Well, screw that. How many prisoners are Catholic? Are the buddhists in mass groups in jail? By Catholic, I mean Catholic, not Christian. Christians are nice people. The Catholic side, a bit hypocritical at times.

Look, Christianity is not about kneeling every Sunday, working your ass off and praying every morning. Its truly what is a perfect world. If you take a bible, literally cut out the unncessary passages about walking in deserts here and there, well, I mean obviously its a fucking desert. What else? Skyscrapers and cities? Being Catholic or Christian was just meant to teach one thing, how to be nice to others and learn that everyone is important and that if you felt that way, life will never have a bad side.

But people twisted that up until now we have some extremists and people who insist on coversions.

So from today onwards I officially declare.
You can skip all this if you want.

By official willingness of free choices and will I, Ansel Tempestt Tan, voluntarily choose to withdraw from the Catholic faith and rid myself of all artefacts, books, inscriptions, words and thoughts of the Catholic faith. Permanently and I shall have no regrets. This withstands all time lengths. This, with all effect, holds true only to the Catholic faith, not withstanding to other Christian beliefs.

I withdraw my belief in Catholicism and hereby retain Freethinker rights.

Drop the tempo a notch or two. You're playing too fast.

2006-09-25T20:01:00.000+08:00

(Behind all the quotes and the post itself there is a hidden message. Search for it if you want.)

"This is the life you chose to live."

Exams coming soon. N level is something not to be trifled with. It will be easy. That's for sure. But I don't WANT just PASS. Maths and Humanities, my weak areas. Humanities will go to hell. Burn along with Saddam Hussien. But Maths, I WANT an A1. Or at least A2. So bad. My true joy. My heartache.

"The rewards and punishments for your sins."

Sleep deprived and getting frustrated. I'm trying not to snap at people. I don't wanna lose any friends. Not this time. Not again. It takes 3 years to build a friendship network. A single year to lose it all. 2 years to clear your name. A month to bring it all back. Within all of this, I'm trying so hard to build up everything I should have already had, on glass flooring.

"Regret! Repent! Remorse!"

Nothing's worse than having to bring your life back from nothing. Believe me darling, before 2005, I could barely pull off very much. Slacking. My results were subpar. My ass was getting kicked on a regular daily basis and I just was BEGGING to be transferred to another school. ANY school. Till this day. I claim no alliance to St Patrick's School. Maybe if anyone asks I'll just tell them I came from St Stephen's Primary, a great school, Playhouse before that, where I met the best friends anyone could ask for. But when it comes to Secondary School. I claim nothing with St. Patrick's Secondary. My loyalties lie with other schools. Any other school. Doesn't matter.

"You suffer because you always wanted to all the long."

This is the path I chose was leading me to a long forgotten dream but fate dealt me a losing hand. Whoever said you can fight Aces and Kings with 3s and 4s must have been very optimistic. There is no point to fighting an uphill battle with in inevitable loss. Heavy losses, I might add. My mum always thought girls were going to lead me to failure when I can't get my mind off them. My dad always was indifferent about the matter. But what happens when it comes to point blank, what happens if the very people you begged to let go of are the only ones who will save your soul from eternal damnation.

"You are happy above it all because that was your goal."

I meant it. Every word. As life came down to these precious few moments, the balance between life and death hangs precariously on a string unfit to carry burden or fault. But this is caused when someone makes a decision for me. All because I had the choice. My very own. To gain a year headstart, or lose a year and work at a slower pace that I should be able to easily beat.

"A dream made to last can never sustain someone."

Alas, a dream is but a dream. Not real. Ethereal in every way. Fragile, isn't it? But this is the result of a life, not my own. Is life the way I want it to be? Not really. But looking at the possiblity of a better life, a personal life, that would have been so much better. Living the dream, the way I want life to be. I have considered and felt what it would be like. A perfect place. My ideal.

"For dreams alone never kept anyone alive."

But something proved that everything I had always wanted will not necessarily be the best. My mum tried her best. St Patrick's Secondary. Like I don't know her plan. Try to figure that out. However, let's just say I backfired it all. Twisted her perception and toyed with rational thinking. I did what I could to lead a revolution. I hung out with a group. Let's just say they could do a lot more than just study and hook up with girls. They understood something more. Something behind everything.

"You believed in your friends. The ones you trust."

What do I mean by that. Does science prove that people can set papers ablaze with nothing more than a coin? Or maybe flinging a watch like a boomerang. Impossible? Some might say. But they perfected it. Not just this form of what people call "telekinesis". It wasn't that. Nothing to do with the mind. Or moving anything with it. They knew how physics worked. About cause and effect. How, if they fling something physically, a mathematical calculation can bring it back. They were the best. Taught me how to heat a coin made of certain material to extremely hot temperatures until it can set papers on fire just by a touch. Science. Pure, science.

"Trust can rot, die and wither away."

But looking back. I would give up my dreams and hopes. All for my life now. At this moment. Why? Life never is and never will be perfect. Even for perfection itself, I want what is now. If I had my way, back in Dunman Secondary or Hai Sing Catholic. Would I have MapleStory friends? Where would Eugene, Joshua, Chun Kee, Benedict be? What would I be doing without Faye, Fiona or Felicia to bug everyday? Where would I be hanging out at without Suraj, Matthew or Brandon? Who would I talk to without Heydi and Riana? How about Amelia? Not much, I don't talk that much to her but just like Nerissa and Monika, they made my education that bit more interesting. Without all that, what life is that? A substandard way of living. Perfect grades and no friends.

"No one ever had to be special to prove their worth."

This is the end. The death of hope and the burial of wishes. This is what I chose. My life I will lead. Starting from today, I take commands from no one. My decision is my own. If I must pay for my mistakes, should any result from these choices, so be it. This is me. Taking over.

"You only had to choose the way you will live."

Oh believe me, this is gonna hurt, like hell.

2006-09-18T19:45:00.000+08:00

-A Bloodstained Letter-

In response to:

------------------------
To: Ansel Tempestt
From: The Guy You Once Called "Friend"

Feeling happy now? Hand in your pocket, feeling cocky and all? Too many friends I suppose. All you wanted right? Friends, a few gadgets and a small load of cash to blow? Well, breaking news, life ain't gonna survive on a dying dream or a flying fuck-as-if-I-care attitude. Life starts now, make it or break it. I can tell from your reactions you don't care what happens to me anymore and if I should die you probably would drop a dollar in the collection tin and walk off for a cup of coffee at McDonalds. Either way, that's not my business anymore.

However, you need to get your act going. Its N levels. A not-so-big thing but I'm sure people will judge you based on that. Let's be honest, kicks and personality is a party gimmick for the rich. Get jet set status then we'll talk compassion. Feeling burn in other people's shoes is just something you do when you can blow a hundred thousand dollars a night and wake up the next morning in front of your ATM withdrawing another few thousand. Not that I'm jealous of them or anything but it would help.

Whoever said money can't buy happiness is full of shit. He probably had 5 dollars in his wallet, nothing to his name, living in the streets and drinking a bottle of Jack Daniel's everyday. Drowning the fact that he's a complete loser and a bum which only the mentally handicapped or insane would date. Let's be honest, who's going to argue with me? I only speak the truth. Now, question time, would you rather be lazing back in your multimillion dollar house or would you rather be drinking a bottle of cheap alcohol? You know which to pick.

Doesn't take a genius to make a million dollars. But it does take cunning and a wicked heart. Maybe I'll see you around someday. I assure you this is the end. My life will go down the drain this year. Sure I've got perfect A1s but this will not last. You will surpass me and if you don't mind, if you ever get successful and you happen to see me down on my luck, give me a ride in your ferrari.

Yes, ok I'm kidding about the ferrari but you will beat me. That's that. But no matter where you go and what you do, don't forget the people who have helped you along the way. I'm perfectly content playing my guitar in Orchard Road for two dollars from a stranger with the only girl I'll ever want and life will be perfect like that. So you can leave me by myself. I'll be ok. But I'm sure the rest want a reward so return the favour. Signing off. Letter sent dated September 11th 2006.
------------------------

Ok. In response to that Daryl. Oops. Was I supposed to keep that a secret? Sorry. I mean Mr Chan. Oh right can't use your surname either. Oh well, sorry Mr Daryl Chan, I won't let anyone know your identity. Secret is safe. I'll call you DC. Secret. Shh. Anyway, apologies in advance for that. Have fun in Germany. And yes, I will get that ferrari. So I can drive to Orchard Road to give you your two dollars. Have a nice day.

Bloodstains on the ballroom floor

2006-09-13T19:19:00.000+08:00

Imagine this scenario. Starting from the day you were born, given life so full of hope. There was always these two people who would take care of you. Want nothing but the best for you. Maybe you never got that because you simply didn't agree. Or they just couldn't for personal reason beyond their control.

But everyone grew up with the dream of one day taking care of someone else. As well as new life and giving everything you possibly can. Even if it meant your own life. But what happened? The entire race is corrupt with power and want only what was in their best interests.

Do you know that the original concept only left marks which couldn't be seen. A love that was not material. Past all that matter and opposition. You still got the love and care from two people who would otherwise not know you. No one signed a contract that day. No one said its a must do. They just felt it had to be done.

Hate them for any reason of your own but that is your personal war. Hatred stems from anger and anger starts from nothing. The only kind of fire that requires no fuel or spark. This is not to make you realise anything. Not to convince you that you owe your parents anything. This is to make you wonder what have you done worth taking note.

That is right. You owe them nothing. Its the greatest deal ever made. Everything for nothing. Even so, does that mean you have to hate anyone? Have you ever been alone. All on your own. Not a single soul to listen. You have a lot to say. Watching left and right as parents hug their children, filling a space within themselves, something to care for. A couple tries to understand each other. A gentle peck on the cheek, learning to have something to live for, someone to love.

You aren't set on a guilt trip for nothing. A path is made for purpose and reason. As such, it shall serve. People walk by you everyday, yet how many do you greet hello. What reason do you need. Do you feel strange saying something so casual to someone you have not come to know? They aren't total strangers to you. Just people you don't dare approach for some reason.

Do you know the greatest gift anyone can ever give you is friendship. It usually takes people years to understand that and some never learn it at all. But how does it feel to have someone at your side? Hand on your shoulder, telling you its always going to be this way and you never have to worry about anything else because you are who you are and you shouldn't change just because someone said so.

Surely someone meant something to you. A kind word. A caring action. That someone was meant to be your friend. Through and through. You share you life with someone else. That is one more person that understands your internal conflict. Once again, life spirals. No one made so much as a verbal agreement this will last forever. Doesn't always have to.

The cycle of life has to go on with or without you. If you don't keep up, you'll find yourself lost. You have a gift of understanding but you lack the resources. No one will help you. Its all against the tide. Those who can't keep up probably deserve to die. Unfortunately that's you. You're going to be the one that tried to swim away so badly you've gone so far no one will ever get you. That will be your turning point. The day you die.

Never did take a lot of effort for someone to help you back on track. You'll never be the same. But you now understand what being close death feels like. The sickening chill of an icy grave. Either way, you do not care anymore. Someone asks you if you have any regrets you say no and everything you do is what you intend to do. Then you decide your answer doesn't fit the point. You're are not ok. You are not going to be fine.

However, this is not a race one can finish alone. Neither can they change who they are. But you try so hard to make something different. To make up for every little failure and every small mistake which you now feel needs correction.

With all that you try your hardest to succeed. To be the one you envy. The life you want to life. The zeal you have always shown. Things will never go your way but at least its not going the way others want it to. Take comfort in the code of conduct for that is the safety line that if you lose grip, no one else can help you. You will fall and whether that is your final mistake, that decision is made by you.

Soon, you realise that not everything in the world can be logically understood, so you set off to look for answers from people who may know. That goes on for 5 years. But at the end of it all. You've achieved nothing and obtained nothing but lost time. Eventually you understand the most accurate statement you've ever heard. Time can be slowed, quickened or delayed. People can soon figure ways to do all that. But one thing they can't do is turn it back. What is lost, remains lost for eternity.

The definitions become so crystal. Forever isn't forever because when you look at things through the eyes of others you realise forever is until time ends. But the key point was till time ends. Which proves an eventual end. Even if its not so close by there is an end.

So, my friends. That is what you should always keep in mind. When you whisper in the ear of the one you love the most. Love you will have shouldn't last forever. Because some things should never have an end. Never cease.

Through this entire passage what did you think of? What do you understand now? If the answer is nothing, then that is really disappointing. But, if you realise that life isn't always flowers and chocolates, sweet honey and clear skies, well, welcome to my world.

Between me and frickin artwork

2006-09-11T20:23:00.000+08:00

You guys like art? Anime maybe? I'm always up for a good one, send me a few from time to time. Nothing porno though. I don't have plans to draw anything like that. Hard to concentrate? Perhaps. But that's besides the point. I prefer clothing designs. Nothing that I'd wanna be a clothing designer and act retardedly gay and hang out with GG. That's creepy.

Would really appreciate any kind of help I can get so feel free to send in any tutorials and lessons. I love those. The kind of artwork I prefer is like Naruto-style. Not as in with flipping ninjas here and there. But with that certain "newer" manga style not that older one like DragonBallZ where everyone had eyeballs that could literally crush someone just by blinking. Yes, I've got my own books and stuff. Eclair of Kiddy Grade is nice right? Tad obscene here and there but that's minor.

Her eyes are up there kiddo. Yes. Look up. Great really. Sure halfway through the series they decided to touch up here and there and increase a few things but that's not the point. I just like the art style.

For some who requested my "proof" its below, taken from a site, where they did a survey. I'm not kidding. No, I didn't take part.

All guys. As you can infer from the chart I've proven that age old theory. 99% of men wank. The other 1% are liars. Don't think too hard, I know what you're trying to imply.

Ya know, its not true that guys don't get frustrated a lot. Its not true that we don't care. Ain't true that you don't matter. Life without love is like a guitar without strings. Useless.

Congrata-fucking-lations

2006-09-10T18:53:00.000+08:00

Stupid printer. That's it. I'm sending a complaint.

(What's in the e-mail)

A few months back I got a Lexmark X2350. Personally, I feel its perhaps the most annoying printer I've ever had. Even an older Lexmark printer made in 1997 or so was better than this by far. This current one has been getting on my nerves and the only thing it was actually "good" for was its scanning capability.

The ink ran out very fast under relaxed conditions, it ruined some, if not all, its print jobs and clogged up the sides of the printer feed numerous times with once clean-and-straight paper. Perhaps it may be the way its operated a that it requires a care level comparable to that of an mentally handicapped person with a severe case of attention deficit disorder but its still extremely frustrating to use.

Now I'm not saying that its entirely all bad but its reaching the point where I will personally illegally "modify" your stupid product with a ball-pein hammer and a chisel. I sincerely pray that this printer does not affect the psychological health of its other users. Suffice to say i ts following the same ideals set by JRR Tolkien and his stupid ring story. The more you use it, the more you slip into insanity.

For one, this printer has desecrated my mental health just by the act of being purchased.

As I type out this message, I was trying to print out a worksheet sent by a friend on MSN. The printer is jammed, won't turn off, the earth wire has come loose sending voltage up my arm as I tried to rectify the problem. This is not compliant to the regulations set by the electionics safety board. Therefore it is with all due respect that to anyone, this is an electrical safety hazard and should not be sold to anyone using a pacemaker or risk a heart attack.

In short, your warranty is of no use to any death resulting from your printer's poor wiring which seems to have been done in Mainland China according to the internal circuitry. I, for one, do and will never, trust the chinese in wiring anything. Possibly making containers and toys but beyond anything with the price tag of 200 dollars, it should be left to people who are actually trained in wiring circuitry.

My conclusion stands, I hope you choke on your nasi lemak you fat weasel.

Sincerely, Ansel Tempestt.

(End of e-mail)

And I will send this too. Already did though.

Told you.

In the news today

2006-09-07T16:43:00.001+08:00

Welcome. Hope you guys enjoyed that Lee Hsien Loong versus Lee Kuan Yew thing. Mee Pok is a dangerous food. Causes wars over it.

Moving on today, we have our correspondant Mr K. Poh working down at our news centre in Iraq. Why Iraq you ask? Cause its cheaper to buy workspace in an open minefield compared to Orchard Road.

In the news today and for the past few days, Steve Irwin has been killed by a stingray, witnesses say he was stabbed in the heart by a bull ray. Know-it-all experts claim he could have stayed alive if he did not pull the barb out as it was puncturing his vital organs. As some may know, the barb is serrated and extremely sharp. However in view of this, we should all go down to Tampines Neighbourhood 2 for some good ol' stingray with sambal. Lime is optional and so is rice.

Credit cards and razor blades

2006-09-06T22:10:00.000+08:00

Heard about Steve Irwin right? Here's a clipping from a report.

"I never pictured a croc killing him, but I never pictured a stingray doing it, either," says Jack Hanna, director emeritus of the Columbus Zoo and Aquarium in Ohio. "It's like me getting killed by a poodle."

Sad really.

Anyway, today's all about signing up for accounts you'll never use. For instance I've signed up to sites on God-knows-where I got it from. Only to get a notice months later, someone wants to do this or that. Really. That's irritating.

Here's a list of stuff you can try.

Flixster
Friendster
IMVU
MSN
Multiply
MySpace
Neopets
Tagged
Yahoo

Interesting, no? I've never used fully about 80% of these sites. In fact, only surface scraping.

Remember the merge for Operation and Losing? Well here's your first proper statement from it.

Ever had a teacher who refers to himself or herself in the third person? For example his name is Mr Lim and he says, "Class, Mr Lim only wants whats best for you." So that's third person. I find that irritating. Try this, next time he/she says something like that reply something like, pretend its in my case, "But sir, I heard from Ansel's imaginary friend, Billy, that Mr Lim doesn't want to teach this class anymore!" Therefore making a fourth person view. Interesting?

And this is the product of boredom and sheer self inflated ego.
(tu)one dead is Joshua.
(li){*•·.·´¯ is Me (as in my response)

Note: This is what happens when you talk to me about stuff I don't care about.

(Yes that means I actually give more attention to hair coloration, stress and people's monthly periods more than I care about your trip. All the stuff, which by the way, I don't really pay much attention to in the first place.)

[5:37:28 PM] (tu)one dead: i am going overseas tml
[5:37:49 PM] (li){*•·.·´¯: er ok
[5:37:50 PM] (li){*•·.·´¯: sure
[5:38:01 PM] (tu)one dead: yup
[5:38:01 PM] (tu)one dead: so dont bother calling me
[5:38:22 PM] (li){*•·.·´¯: er i don't call you in the first place?
[5:38:33 PM] (tu)one dead: -_-
[5:38:36 PM] (tu)one dead: watever
[5:38:39 PM] (li){*•·.·´¯: well it is true
[5:38:56 PM] (tu)one dead: ...
[5:40:12 PM] (li){*•·.·´¯: seriously i call faye more than you...
[5:40:18 PM] (li){*•·.·´¯: and everyone knows that's never.
[5:40:27 PM] (tu)one dead: okok
[5:40:27 PM] (tu)one dead: i mean sms
[5:40:28 PM] (tu)one dead: watver
[5:40:32 PM] (tu)one dead: argh...
[5:40:50 PM] (li){*•·.·´¯: but i don't sms anyway?
[5:41:03 PM] (tu)one dead: yes u do..
[5:41:05 PM] (tu)one dead: sometimes
[5:41:07 PM] (tu)one dead: so yup
[5:41:09 PM] (tu)one dead: jsut shhh
[5:41:38 PM] (li){*•·.·´¯: you're like lowest ranking next to eugene and suraj. as in.. 157th place tie? no, wait you're 158th.
[5:42:02 PM] (tu)one dead: so?....
[5:42:08 PM] (tu)one dead: the point is i wont be here
[5:42:10 PM] (tu)one dead: ok?
[5:42:13 PM] (tu)one dead: there fullstop
[5:42:15 PM] (tu)one dead: sshshs
[5:43:09 PM] (li){*•·.·´¯: but if you wanted me to shh why are you still msging?

Next time you wanna open your trap make sure I actually give a shit. Brandon and I warmly wish you happy holidays and hope you break a leg. I mean really. Break one. Or both if you're that qualified.

However if you don't like my service you can give customer service a call or drop by during office hours, which are 8.00am to 8.01am. Do give us at least 58 seconds to straighten up and get fully dressed. Also give an additional 1.5sec to unlock the door. Don't send us any mail, we won't reply. We strictly believe in saving the trees.

Back to the posting. In parliment today there was an arguement between our Prime Minister and Senior Minister. Nothing physical though.

This is how it started.

You see, Lee Hsien Loong later ate the Mee Pok. Lee Kuan Yew wasn't too happy.

KuanYew: Oi! You eat my Mee Pok ah? Bloody hell. You watch out.
HsienLoong: Ya ya. I very scared of you. My gang bigger hor.
KuanYew: You dare talk to me like that? I am your father!

HsienLoong: My balls bigger.

KuanYew: Try la! Come compare!

HsienLoong: Bigger than your house sia!
KuanYew: My house is your house right?!

SRNathan: OI! MAKE SO MUCH NOISE 干吗(GAN MA)?! Shaddup and say sorry!

Short story. Not that I hate them or anything. Just is.

Here's a clip from the Operation Procrastination Team 2. Slacking off. Cause that's what we do. The dude you see we're pointing at is Nicholas. The hand that takes away the book and stuff with the finger and all belongs to Joshua and since Eugene was unavailable to be cameraman, I took up the job.

I don't know if you enjoyed any part of it. It was just crap when we were bored so relax.

Besides that. Nothing else. I'll leave you with a few final words before I take my leave for this post.

"Dreams don't survive on dreams alone. With all that you want comes a price. A price that no one can pay but you. Love may be the biggest dream you can ever have. The kind you share with someone special. Never was about him or her. Just all about you. Learn what you want for yourself and you will learn to treat that special someone the same way." - Unknown

Step right up, folks!

2006-09-05T18:38:00.000+08:00

Step right up, folks! Today the name of the game is Pun-ishment. Stupid pun jokes here and there. Heard the story Ra-pun-zel? Neither have I, but we'll move along.

The first offical post of Project Salvacion. Hmm, it doesn't take a genius to figure the meaning. Salvacion(Spanish for Salvation). Project was just added in for the fun of it. If you check Project Salvation, its a Spanish site, or at least when I checked it, it was. Could be a porn site now. Hey, anything is possible.

Anyone played Dynasty Warriors? A brain-dead whack-to-kill game about senseless violence set in the period of the Romance Of The Three Kingdoms (Shin Sangoku Musuo). I like the style of Zhuge Liang. Interesting. Kills people with a feather fan. Who says everyone must like the most powerful character? Incidentally the most powerful is Lu Bu, an ancient Chinese war "demon" who got executed and stuff. He killed God-knows-how-many people. I don't know the whole story, go read up.

Tried Werther's Original? My dad called it worthless original. Just like the kid. Here, kid, you're worth less than the clothes you're wearing. Sad but funny then.