After months of planning and extensive work, this is the result. Not much to look at or even a very good skin.
But you gotta admit. Its pretty awesome.
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Monday, May 28, 2007
all she wanted was to be with u, but u pushed her away. bit by bit she crumbled, soon to disappear. she cared for u but u couldn't see, guess u were too self absorbed to know. one day she left and never return, not a tear u shed.
i guess, what she wanted was to spend time with someone she really cared about...but i din care enuff. all she did was to _______ me..and this is the way i treated her. am i still a man? even though she has her own flaws, she is still special in her own way. i thought that i'd rather die than to see her like this, worse is to know that i caused this upon her. how can i ever forgive myself for this. to see her smile makes me float on cloud nine. now she's so far away, i wished that there was a way to get her back...let her be happy again...after all that she's been thru, it was the least that i could do..i remember how she hated the way her ex treated her..i dun want her to hate me too..
maybe i could start by putting myself in her shoes sometimes...perhaps when she says that she's fine, she really isn't..and there is always something up.. i could.. pay attention to the way she talks. maybe short responses means that she is trying to hide something..man i dunno how to figure girls out, they are just so complicated...they say one thing and can mean the other..i guess she fears that i would be like her ex like that, who liked her at first, but when she breaks, i just cannot find strength within myself to comfort her..and i start liking her less..till i drop her. she shatters.
i wanna be there for her.. i want her to know that i'll always be there to catch her when she falls. i dun ever want to see her sad bcos it makes me sad too..i want to talk more, want to know more about her..i want to me the person she could always count on..i wished that i could tell her the answers to all the stuff she asks me..just that i dunno how to put it.. why is she important to me? is it bcos i care about her? she's my friend? or is she more than a friend? is it bcos she's the air that i breathe?
i did something not so good.. i left her by herself today..i guess i was tired and needed to sleep.. i hope that she doesn't mind..hope that it doesn't build a wall between us..juz hope that she would understand..i wonder what would happen on my bday.. hmm...